12 February 2008

Celebrating 8 Months of Mediocrity in Iraq


Today marks my 8-month anniversary of being in Iraq. Being a Navy "body-fill" for an Army Staff definitely has it's perks. People don't know what to expect of you and they don't understand what the hell a Navy Junior Officer is doing in Iraq in the first place. This allows my superiors to forego any "career development" or "you should think about staying in" conversations that are always excruciatingly painful. My superiors actually appreciate my bitterness and despair, as long as it doesn't affect my responsibilities at work of course, which I haven't messed up too badly yet. I never go out on convoys and am lucky enough to be chained to a desk. However, one of my Navy chums that has to go out frequently with the senior brass describes it as "being like Ensign Ricky just waiting to get blown to smithereens" (note picture above). This dark humor may be disturbing, and if you were looking for someone embellishing their experience to doll myself up as some sort of "hero" who loves his country, I'm sorry, but you should look elsewhere. Sure there are American heroes in Iraq, but you're certainly not going to find any amongst my group of peers. We are mediocre at best.

14 comments:

Bag Blog said...

If I didn't know that you were a cynical smart ass, I would be worried about you.

Nixon said...

Haha, it's like no one's allowed to have a sense of humor these days.

Anonymous said...

From my experience, mediocrity in military units equals highly productive in many civilian jobs. The military standard is just that high, no kidding!

dutchmarbel said...

Do your job, stay save an follow your conscience. People aiming to be a hero seldom become one.

Sean Dustman said...

I wish I could keep my head down more but I feel like one of those girls in the movie Almost Famous. I feel the guys above think, I'll give you a case for that guy, he builds bookshelves and takes lots of pictures for free. But then again, I'm not doing the convoy thing at all.

Nixon said...

Thank you DutchMarbel, that was nice.

Anonymous, I guess there's hope for me yet. As long as my civilian employer doesn't start asking me a bunch of questions about "So...How many people did you kill in Iraq?" showing his misunderstanding of the modern military's function.

Doc,

Haha, at least you'd get to go to all the parties and see the bands for free. It sure is fun to be a Navy person in a not-so-Navy realm, I'm right there with ya.

Anonymous said...

Lt. Nixon,
Good morning. Seeing as I said on Blackfive that I usually disagree with you -- so now you're telling me it's all a put on??? Are you just the slacker you're saying -- oh, wait, not a slacker, just mediocre. Just an office worker who happens to wear a uniform? And doesn't like anything about anything? And what's with the disguise? If everyone knows -- are you even a Lt.? Or is that a snarky thing, too?
Am I misunderstanding your whole point??
Kath

Nixon said...

Kath,

I'm sorry you don't appreciate my sense of humor. I thought it was pretty funny. I'm not sure what Blackfive comments you are referring to, please let me know so I can properly address them. Am I mediocre...absolutely! A disguise...not so much. I'm confused are you calling me a *gasp* "phony soldier". If you think to yourself how could someone so mediocre at life be in the military, well that's a reality you'll have to accept. Come back often and learn more.

Also, is this your blog, my google skills aren't up to snuff, so I'm not sure. No need for anonymous comments here, I'm not mean. I'm not sure what you misunderstand though. I'm just some Navy guy in Baghdad who enjoys blogging, what more could you ask for.

Anonymous said...

No, no, talk to me!! I have been accused of being too much of a smart ass, so I usually can recognize one -- but am I wrong, that there's truth underneath there?? You really don't like it, do you? I'm just asking.
And I don't have a blog, bec. I don't have time.
This morning you commented on the Pinkers, those awful people, I can't stand the whole idea of what they're doing. Whatever. Nobody wants to read what I wrote, I'd rather hear from you.
And, seriously, not trying to be anony., but have trouble negotiating all the ins and outs of signing in and out everywhere!! I'd give you my e-mail but don't want it published, what to do? So I'm stuck out here in blogworld.
(And it is too a disguise.)

Nixon said...

Kath,

My apologies, I misunderstood your initial comment, didn't mean to come off nasty. No, I don't like Code Pink much, as I don't like any irrational group much. They exist both on the right and left of domestic politics. You can peruse my opinion of Code Pink here. Yes I remain anonymous as directed by my chain of command. I read what you wrote, and I agree. They are knuckleheads.

Anonymous said...

ah, ok. That makes sense. Then why bother with the picture?
Yes, the Pink people, to me, are scary bec. they SOOOO believe they are right. No option for anything else. And, yes, when anybody does that, then they have become irrational and scary.
Thanks for answering. It's nice that you read the comments.
K.

Nixon said...

Kath,

Of course I read the comments. I also answer email. Feel free to email me at LTNixonrants (at) Gmail (dot) com.

Anonymous said...

LOL, funny stuff. Other veterans appreciate that the sacrifice isn't just getting shot at, it's being in a miserable place, under miserable circumstances, having to do what the F* your told all the time, missing your family, and just generally being a part of a machine that will live with or without you. Good luck, lots of opportunities for veterans like you in our government making a difference when you get out.

Nixon said...

Not Afraid of Robots,

I wrote this when I was having a bad day a few months back, and thought it was some good dark humor. Thanks for swinging by!