06 April 2008

Deep-Seated Hatred of Yuppies

One bit of hatred I have fostered and have not been able to shake since adolescence is my scorn for yuppies. You know the type. The people founnd in urban and suburban dwellings with a foreign-made SUV sporting a camper attached to the roof, which is replete with bumper stickers about saving the environment and impeaching the president. Their endless quest to enhance their career, their wine and cheese parties, and their worship of their pets who get spa treatments all make me ill to my stomach. It's not so much an envy complex for what I don't possess, but rather a disgust for the entire culture. The fact that they attempt to "educate the public" for their paltry causes gives them moral justification to indulge themselves on an unsustainable lifestyle.

One thing I have found incredibly disturbing is their position on politics. I don't accuse them of apathy, but they tend to seek a political agenda which infringes on the life of everyone that doesn't subscribe to their creed. Yeah, they want public transportation, but for all the other people, jerks like you and me. They also seem to have some infatuation with bike lanes. What is this, the dark ages? Their desire to understand other cultures is not of a sense of respect or interest in history, but rather to exploit it for their own needs for the sake of authenticity. Because they don't want to admit that they are fake people, governed by their greed for endless consumption.
Their obsession with health and spending time at the gym is merely a distraction to avoid any discussion of their vapid souls while in a social setting. Because, it is only through struggle and hardship that we can gain experience and wisdom. The endless quest for hedonism and this "Garden of Eden" mentality that pervades our very shops and cafes in our city streets is untenable in a society of multiple individuals and it must be accepted that not everyone is going to be the same. This "Self-Confidence" and "Self-Esteem" that hack television hosts have been peddling for years fails to address the concept of humility. Only when you realize that you are not God's gift to humanity can you listen to others and gain knowledge from their insight. I've never thought that I had all the right answers, but I have been able to learn quite a bit from a variety of individuals from various backgrounds due to paying attention and not trying to come off like I am better than them. Perhaps, this is why I harbor so much hatred. It may be due to the fact that I deplore when people think they are somehow better than everyone else. Because this would imply that their is an "ideal" human being, when our modern world clearly indicates that ideals are subjected to a lot of discourse and debate.

Some may construe my hatred to me being part of the cult of victimization, where I see other people's actions as belittling and demeaning to my own. This is far from the truth, as the quickest way to enlightenment is through disavowing mere material luxuries. Only then can the truth be known. I have a lot to stay about willfully stupid people, but I'll save that for another day.


Herschl said...

These rubes are not completely without value. Their hedonistic consumption creates a marketplace where hard working and industrious people can generate endless supplies of useless furnishings and feed their families. An entire upper-middle crust of society vying for the newest and trendiest clothes, cars and home decor ensures a sellers market. The emperor will have his new clothes and everyone is going to make a buck. Capitalism is great. Don't forget sir, consumption must be balanced by production.

LT Nixon said...


Yeah, I'm a staunch free-marketer, but shouldn't we question just buying consumer drivel. Bonus points for effectively using the word "rubes", sir. You have my respect.

dutchmarbel said...

Now, you can attack lots of things... but you DO have to understand that bikelanes are GOOD. Especially in cities.


some yuppies are cool like the one from American Psycho!!!! No comment on the post about the IA, NP, or IP's though..... Take it easy sir and be safe!

Tin Ma'am said...

damn? Am i technically a yuppy? I dunno.

Ms. Kiyum said...

I hate you too. Love,

Ms. Kiyum

Anonymous said...

It seems like what you really detest is narcissism.

I find myself conflicted in these discussions because while I mostly agree with what you're saying, these kind of rants seldom cut both ways.

For example, why is trying to protect the environment (with some self-righteousness thrown in) any more narcissistic than using the environment like a two dollar whore with no regard to anything other than one's own immediate gratification? In fact, isn't the latter more contemptible?

This might seem like a non sequitur, but it reminds me of arguments about welfare. People probably freaking die early due to high blood pressure caused by their seething thoughts of lazy welfare moms leeching off the system, while corporate welfare hardly even enters their consciousness.

What I'm getting at is what I see as a disparity in our collective outrage in most matters, like we're all yelling a the damn kids on our lawn while someone else is moving everything we own out the backdoor.

So sure, these people can be annoying and they're often hypocrites (which isn't saying much since we're all hypocrites) but on my list of "people who deserve to be knocked down a few pegs" they don't rank at the top.

Anonymous said...

This reminded me of the recent Starbucks "stand down" for employee training. There were actually stories with quotes from people complaining...apparently not being able to get a latte for a few hours one afternoon was an unbearable hardship.

I'd be interested in a follow-up post explaining why you chose to use the pictures you included with the post.

Caroline said...

To me "yuppie" is that detestable self important state of mind. It's the way they turn up their nose to anything that isn't what "Popular Yuppie" told them to buy/think. It's not their causes or their cars; it's their, "the world revolves around me and what I think" quality that makes them unredeemable.

Wek said...


Yes, consumerism creates jobs in production. Problem is the manufacturing isn't being done by American workers.

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Anonymous said...


are there really any yuppies anymore?

are there any yuppies in the military? ring knockers?

why or why not?

Christine said...

You wrote what has been going through my head for years.

I have gone to work in an office for half my life and I detest the people in them. Yuppies. All they talk about is everything you mentioned. I consider myself to be "real". You are "real". Yuppies are fake. Made up of all of their material possessions. If it weren't for that bigger house, fancier car, designer clothes, the entertainment news of the week, cause of the moment, they would be nothing. Empty human shells.

Like you, my life has been filled with a variety of people from all over the world. Always willing to listen to both sides of the story and then attempting to make an informed decision. Based on fact and history.

Thank you Lt. Nixon for your hard work and dedication to your country . Rant on. :)

Alex said...

You'd really get a kick out of Stuff White People Like. It pretty much goes over everything you mentioned.

LT Nixon said...


I just picked on bike lanes as a f'instance. I'm actually a conservationist to some extent (live in a small residence, take public transportation sometimes, etc.)


Yeah that dude was cool. Especially when he boffed two chicks at once.

Tin Ma'am/Ms. Kiyum,

Geez. Don't take anything I say personally. It was just a ramble, not the law of the land.


I don't detest environmentalism or conservationism. I just hate when people are environmentalists but drive gas-guzzlers and live in huge estates.


Yeah when starbucks had that stand-down training, i thought people were going to resort to cannibalism.


I agree.


Thanks for stopping in! I learn a lot from your blog.


Yes there are yuppies in the military (amongst officers usually). Not necessarily ring-knockers, but just an over-riding douchiness.


Your welcome. Come back often.


Yeah that site is hilarious!

dutchmarbel said...

I just picked on bike lanes as a f'instance.

I was hesitant about putting the smiley in. When I wrote the comment it seemed more obviously present than when I reread it, so maybe I ought to use them more.

Anonymous said...

I agree with most of the comments as well.
As for the Pics...The last-one, I don't understand the yuppieniss there but I do appreciate the upper-thigh action shown...BOOYAH


Bag Blog said...

In NM I called them "gate closers" - you know the ones who moved to the mountains from some big city to find "the real life". But they did not want anyone else to move there - so as not to taint their new found Utopia. They want the land to stay "untouched" yet they build huge million dollar homes. Then they need a golf course, Starbucks, etc. but think they are roughing it because there is not a Super Wal-Mart nor will they allow one. They say they despise the government, but they are the first in line for any gov programs. They must "get theirs" before someone else gets it. Rant, Rant...It got so bad that some of us up and moved ot OK.

Kiyum said...

Lt Nixon,

I was being snarky. I'm perfectly fine with my semi-yuppiness. You have a well-documented hatred of pretty people and yuppies, yet you still love me. You know you do. I only do Yoga to be flexible and and help control my medical condition. Yes, I'm bastardizing someone else's spiritual beliefs, BUT as you can tell from my hiking pictures you posted, I'm very flexible and have great upper thighs. Mwah!


LT Nixon said...


Glad you liked the thigh shot. That's probably as much action as we are getting until we get out of here.

Bag Blog,

Haha, gate closers. Were a lot of them from CA?

David M said...

The Thunder Run has linked to this post in the blog post From the Front: 04/07/2008 News and Personal dispatches from the front lines.

Bag Blog said...

Why yes, many were from CA with money to burn and buy up desert to drive up the land prices. The local yokels were laughing all the way to the bank except now they have to live with these gringo gate closers.

Anonymous said...

Their desire to understand other cultures is not of a sense of respect or interest in history, but rather to exploit it for their own needs for the sake of authenticity.

That was the best of several good points!

(By the way, what's wrong with wanting to impeach the president? It's the only non-treasonous way to get rid of the guy!)


LT Nixon said...


I just hate impeachment chic (e.g. the bumper sticker on the volvo in the upscale neighborhood in liberal-land, USA)

jess roxx said...


teddybear said...

You hit the nail right on the head. Glad to see someone say what most of us have been thinking for years!

God Bless and Stay Safe!