04 May 2008

Coed Dorm Rooms Cripple America

Some parents are freaking out that their daughters may be shacked up in dorm rooms on college campuses across America with a bunch of hormonally-charged dudes! Fox News has the breaking story (h/t Dave):

Debbie Feldman's 20-year-old daughter, Samantha, is a sophomore at Oberlin in Ohio and plans to room with her platonic friend Grey Caspro, a straight guy, next year. Feldman said she was shocked when her daughter told her. "When you have a male and female sharing such close quarters, I think it's somewhat delusional to think there won't be sexual tension," the 52-year-old Feldman said. "Maybe this generation feels more comfortable walking around in their underwear. I'm not sure that's a good thing.”

First off, Ms. Feldman should be embarrassed that her nosy mother is snooping around her personal affairs at the age of 20. There seems to be a prevalent trend amongst modern society for parents to not let their baby birds fly away from the nest, and this will no doubt create a generation of twentysomethings living in their parent's basement. Second, the concerned mommy seems to be forgetting the cheeky shenanigans that could ensue ala Three's Company! The only line I would draw in the sand is coed bathrooms. Nothing is worse for a guy than taking a dump while a chick is brushing her teeth in the sink within audible distance in a college bathroom. And as for women using the bathroom, frankly, I don't want to know what the hell goes on in there.

The collegiate version would be even more hilarious


Kath said...

There's already a bunch of 20 somethings living with their parents -- and not in the basement, either. Upstairs in their own bedrooms and having the run of the house. They won't leave or Mom and Dad won't let them -- not sure which. It's too hard out in the world for them, don't you know?

My parents THOUGHT that no guys could even come in my dorm at school -- yeah, and no alcohol and no smoking either. No, never, no way. I wasn't going to tell them any different.

The deal with this is it's just more out in the open is all.

olgreydog7 said...

I think it's wrong, and here is why. Think about the guy who is the "platonic friend." This guy is the Ducky from 16 Candles. If he is allowed to live with his "friend" who we all knwo he is secretly in love with, he'll NEVER get laid, never get a real girlfriend, and never have a life. Having been dismissed to the friend zone way more times than I wanted, I can say that I don't wish that fate on anyone. What dude that can get chicks wants to bring home his date to another chick? All this will do is further cement the nice guy into the friend zone. Not a good idea.

Anonymous said...

If Ms. Feldman's parents are paying for the dorm room (and tuition, etc.) then they should have some say about what their money pays for. At that point she has the choice of whether or not to take their money and their rules or figure out how to pay for it herself.

LT Nixon said...


Even long duck dong got laid in 16 candles didn't he? But yeah, being in the friend zone is heinous.


My parents said I was out the door at 18, and I'm grateful for that.


Good point. But college isn't just about throwing up in the frat house bathroom, shouldn't these youngsters learn about living life independently?

Thus Spake Ortner said...

"college isn't just about throwing up in the frat house bathroom"

I'm so ashamed to know you right now.

I went to a military college, as far as I am concerned, I never went to college.

Kath said...

so you paid your own way thru college? The whole time? No money from Mom and Dad? Do tell.

Bag Blog said...

Back in my college days (about the time they invented the wheel) boys had certain vistor's times and then had to sign in to the women's dorms. Of course there were ways around this if one wanted, but to me it was a safety measure for the girls. Men roaming the halls just did not happen. Things have certainly changed and that is one of the reasons that our daughter did not "go off" to college and still lives at home. It is not because we want to control her, but we cannot provide protection if she is "out there" living independently. What is "living your life independently" anyway? Is it learning to protect yourself from pervs? No thanks. My daughter can make a living, pay her own way, keep house, cook meals, etc. Aren't those things learning to live independently? But if you mess with my daughter, her daddy will meet you at the door with his 30-30. Actually, she has her own guns - gives new meaning to girls and guns.

Anonymous said...

college isn't just about throwing up in the frat house bathroom, shouldn't these youngsters learn about living life independently?

My response is going to fall a lot in line with what bag blog wrote. Dorm life bears no relation to living independently. From what I've heard, it's more like barracks living than independent living.

You have a limited amount of personal space and are subject to inspection at any time (for safety hazards and rules violations). You don't pay for the electricity, water, etc.- just any "extras" (e.g. cable and long distance). Most don't have any cooking facilities. You eat at the dining hall, order in, or eat microwavable foods and snacks. Someone else takes care of all of the maintenance and in many dorms someone else even cleans the bathroom for you.

College grads who go from 4 years of dorm life to living on their own after graduation aren't that much more prepared than someone who goes straight onto their own at 18. In some ways they are less prepared because they have had 4 more years (or so) of things being taken care of for them. Living in an apartment funded by (or with help from) Mommy and Daddy for at least one of those years is closer to living independently than dorm life is. There are consequences if the electric bill doesn't get paid. Either way though, there is always a back-up that isn't there when you are "really" on your own and independent.

Anonymous said...

The "from what I've heard" part refers to barracks living. I've lived in dorms, but not barracks.

Ms. Kiyum said...

You really don't want to know what goes on in the womyn's bathrooms. Lt Kiyum has refused to share a bathroom with me in all 12 years of our cohabitation up until a few months ago. I've promised to not be such a slob, and he's promised to look over the occasionally slip into slobdom.