Culture of Conformity, The Kids Aren't Alright

Above The Influence: One Example of The Epidemic of Uncoolness from Today's Youth

The superb journalist, Kerry Howley, wrote an article in the LA Times discussing the nature of today's youth and their predisposition to side with socially conservative values and wussiness. She cites numerous bits of empirical evidence:

For every Paris Hilton, there is a Hannah Montana. Along with the sordid materialism of "The Hills," cable television has brought us cloyingly wholesome, kid-friendly entertainment from channels such as Noggin, Sprout and Playhouse Disney...Kids are more likely to wear bike helmets today, though not because bikes are more dangerous. Wealth engenders risk-aversion, and over-mothered kids are ultimately a sign that so much has been invested in them.

Looking around at our great nation's youngsters, I am inclined to agree with Ms. Howley. However, I disagree with her conclusion that this is beneficial to modern living since the kids aren't out of control. Rather, this is a fuckin' scourge upon modern civilization, since the future will be deprived of unconventional thinkers! It's no secret that society is tits up: corrupt politicians, people massacring each other in places like Zimbabwe, environmental woes, AIDS, terrorist thugs still not captured or dead, the dollar sucks, our national debt is out of control, and on and on. Our world needs critical and revolutionary thinkers to get us out of this mess. Unfortunately, most kids are satisfied being spoon-fed mainstream culture from the likes of American Idol and posting their boring pics on Facebook from the abstinence concert they got to "rock out" to during their summer break. That is, of course, if these poor kids even get to have a summer as their parents whisk them from college prep courses to cross-town playdates at the age of 8.

High school has been out of session in my neck of the woods for weeks, and I have only once wanted to hurl a half-filled beercan at some young punk driving too fast down my street. You wouldn't believe that WA once spawned the counterculture phenomenon known as "Grunge". In those days, I bet my mailbox, symbolic of the establishment and everything wrong in the world, would have been knocked down at least 3 times by this point in summer. Yet my mailbox still stands! The decline of hessian culture in the suburbs for young boys may have something to do with this, but a lack of underground activity in urban areas, like raves in the late 90s, is also apparent of a larger problem. So, parents, I beg of you not to micromanage your kids lives and let bygones be bygones. Try to ignore certain habits, like that incense they keep burning in their room when their scruffy looking friends come over, and remember that they have the rest of their life to work for "The Man" (like yours truly). We need unconventional ideas in these dire times, and it's best not to dilute their creativity with nonsense. For goodness sakes, if it wasn't for Gen Xers calling bullshit on abominable culture in the 90s, Mark Wahlberg might still be singing horrendously over-engineered tunes instead of making excellent movies like The Departed.



Do you want this to be the future of culture? I certainly hope not.