03 February 2009

Journalist Dreams Up Murder Fantasy for Punxsutawney Phil

And you thought Groundhog Day was just a fun-spirited movie and a metaphor for an Iraq deployment. This journalist from Michigan is dead serious about offing Punxsutawney Phil because it's too depressing to hear that winter is going to drag on. From The Flint Journal:

But something about that damned gopher (groundhog, mole, whatever) in Punxsutawney, Pa., makes me think dark, murderous thoughts.

Why is a rodent allowed to make me wonder, even for a moment, if winter really is going to last six more blasted weeks? I know he's just a mole (gopher, groundhog, whatever) but still the little furball gets in my head when he doesn't predict an early spring, and I don't like it.
Groundhog-Human relations have already been strained this year as the NYC mayor got bit today, and further economic collapse might make groundhogs a possible addition to beef stew for struggling families.


Anonymous said...

Be careful. Killing him might mean eternal winter for all of us!

LT said...

HA! I actually deployed for my second time on Groundhog's Day, 2005. It was one of those ironies that was just too much

Shea said...

Iraq is kinda like groundhog day. The same shit just keeps happening everyday, day after day, on and on, except there's no bill murray.