16 February 2008

The Crap Douchey White People Like

There's a pretty hilarious blog out there that mocks the doucheiness and hypocrisy of contemporary yuppie liberals. It's aptly titled "Stuff White People Like" (h/t to Junkyard Blog). Not that I hate all liberals or even contemporary, yuppie, douchey liberals, but the site is pretty damn funny. Here's a smattering of the stuff white people like:

Expensive Sandwiches: The waiters and waitresses in these places are highly coveted by the white population. They are not quite as cool as bartenders, not quite as snobby as coffee shop workers, but still artsy, young, and more than likely to be a musician/artist/writer (since they only have to work from 11-3).

Indie: First, it allows them to say “oh, this? I got this shirt at Goodwill for $3.” This statement focuses the attention on the shirt, taking attention away from the $350 jeans and $200 shoes. The white person can then retain that precious ‘indie’ cred.

Apple Products: White people also need iPods, iPhones, Apple TV, AirPort Express stations, and anything else that Apple will produce. Because you need to express your uniqueness by purchasing everything that a publicly traded company produces.

As of right now, there's over 60 of these things and they are all filled with the things "white" people love and cherish, but I feel way left out since I hate all this stuff. While I do admit complicity in #11, I'm going to try and get the folks at the website to post something on "Flying V Guitar Solos". It doesn't fit in with the anti-yuppie meme of the blog, but man, those licks totally rock!

130 dB of Kickin' Ass

2 comments:

Wek said...

LT Nixon- I beg you not to ask the folks at that website to post on "Flying V solos". Thrash shows are one of the few sanctuaries remaining the yuppies haven't invaded. And you know there are some folks who read that site and use it as a checklist to 'better yuppie themselves'. If I start seeing BMW's at Slayer shows I swear to god I'll kick their doors and quarter panels in.

In the meantime, enjoy a " V Solo ": http://youtube.com/watch?v=X5LRUCPl_14&feature=related

LT Nixon said...

Wek,

I already commented on V Guitars and cheap beer, but I made it clear that they were not yuppie. No wine spritzers at the Slayer show just yet, hopefully! I did send an email to the good folks at Stuff White People Like to say that White People like thinking the military guy at the party is going to "Timothy McVeigh" the place and go nutzoid. This might explain why I can never meet the ladies at White People parties. They did respond, and perhaps a post on that hilarious site. Thanks for the Megadeth jam, shreddin'!