16 January 2009

Wingnut Military to Begrudgingly Implement Withdrawal Plan From Iraq!

One of the most ridiculous post-Obama election conspiracies was that the military was going to implement some sort of revolt against the new President-elect and implement a junta where liberal baby Alex would get drafted to die in Iraq...at the age of 2! I guess if you believe that the military is chocked full of neo-nazis in uniform, you'd believe anything. At least the 9/11 conspiracies had a barrage of slo-mo videos with smoke poofs to back up their allegations. Put down that tin foil hat and sleep comfortably folks, because the military is implementing plans for a 16-month withdrawal from Iraq in case The Obama wants to follow up on his campaign promise. From AP:

"Our military planners do not live in a vacuum," Pentagon spokesman Geoff Morrell said. "They are well aware that the president-elect campaigned on withdrawing (combat) troops from Iraq on a 16-month timeline, so it would be only prudent of them to draw up plans that reflected that option."

The 16-month option, which would represent a speedier withdrawal of battle troops from Iraq than defense officials preferred, would be among a range of plans presented to Obama whenever he asks, Morrell said. Since that request could come as early as the afternoon of Inauguration Day on Tuesday, the plans will be ready then, Morrell said.
Much of the military's credibility is based on following the orders of elected civilian leaders. Why would they have jeopardized that? Conspiracy theory suffers from the fact that there is some tight-knit cabal pulling the strings of the entire world. Anyone who's worked at any position for the federal government will understand that no one is that smart, and you'll be lucky if someone can figure out how to get the office printer to work.

4 comments:

jariten said...

If making printers work directly correlated to conspiratorial domination then Metts would be Arch-king of the Shadow World Order. Which would be awesome.

Ms. K said...

Baby Alex is clearly a pansy.

J. said...

I think this is the sanest post that you've ever written. Kudos! I think there is an age component. My mother, god bless her, had her formative years in the 1950s-1960s, and she is convinced that you can trust no one in the govt. It's all a big conspiracy to defraud the people. I tell her the same thing - Mom, they're really not that smart, they could never pull it off even if they had roadmaps and compasses.

LT Nixon said...

Metts was also really good at fixing copiers. People on the boat gave him a hard time, but I like a guy who can get 'er done, even if you have to explain the task several times.

J.,

A guy who worked at the U.N. explained this to me when I was about 20 and developing and getting into illumunati conspiracy theory. That dude set me straight, and man was he right.