Iraq News (30 April)

The Good: Iraq's major source of income is oil exports, and with the crackdown on militias/smugglers in Basrah coupled with the high price of crude, they are set to reap a windfall of dinars. Whether or not their government spends it wisely is a whole nother ball of wax. US involvement in Sadr City is deepening (which used to be off-limits more or less), and with that there will need to be a whole new level of service initiatives along with the combat operations. More good news from Basra as there are a resurgence of weddings (despite the author of this blog being grouchy about such occasions back in the states).

The Bad: Another female suicide bomber strikes, this time attacking in Diyala province. A top-level official at the Ministry of Labor and Social Affairs has been assassinated in Baghdad, along with one US soldier being killed by an IED in more Baghdad violence. The LA Times is reporting that civilians were killed in a Sadr City airstrike. Two Sahwa fighters were killed near the northern city of Kirkuk.

The Ugly: Richard Butler says he was kidnapped by Hezbollah-type thugs, which further illuminates Iranian involvement in the southern city of Basra. The trial for Saddam's old deputy Prime Minister Aziz, alleged to have been complicit in massacring 42 Iraqi merchants back in 1992, has been put on hold until late May due to one of the defendants being in poor health. The defendant in "poor health" is genocidal nutjob, Chemical Ali, who went on a hunger strike earlier this month to get put back in a cushy US detention center. Also, Tariq Aziz's lawyer didn't show up (these ex-Ba'athist guys just don't get any love, who would've thought!).

"Dude, where's my Lawyer?"

The Tobacco Terrorists

Is our most celebrated and stress-relieving vice of smoking supporting terrorism? From the Fox News blogs:

Cigarette smugglers are able to generate millions of dollars in illegal profits with a great deal of this wealth being sent to terrorist groups overseas – groups that would like nothing more than to inflict devastating harm on our country and its citizens.” The fifteen page report, obtained by FOX, includes intelligence from law enforcement sources as well as New York State’s Department of Taxation and Finance.

I should probably feel guilty for smoking, but then I realized that this was Fox News and they might just be making shit up. Besides, everyone knows terror finances are somehow connected to oil. It doesn't help that oil is used for just about everything in modern society.

Solution to Nuclear Waste: Just Dump It on Al Gore's Lawn

An environmentalist friend of mine from the Seattle area once questioned me on a possible solution to CO2 emissions in the energy sector in response to global warming. I strongly suggested nuclear power since it emits no CO2 and has been used safely for decades. However, the problems with nuke power is that it requires an enormous amount of investment capital to construct a power plant, training personnel for safe operation is costly, public hysteria to splitting atoms resulting in never ending protests, and where in the world to dispose of nuclear waste. She sent me this Scientific American article which discusses the problems with reprocessing spent fuel.

In lamens terms, the fuel used in most reactors is a combination of the U-235 and U-238 isotopes of Uranium (which can be mined). When the fuel is exposed to neutrons bouncing around to heat up the reactor, some of the U-238 become Plutonium-239. This stuff does not occur naturally in mother nature, since it's quite unstable, and is also used in nuclear warheads. The author of the Scientific American article argues that since it is so expensive to recycle the plutonium and terrorists could get their mitts on it, fuel reprocessing is a bad idea. Ultimately, the question becomes how do we dispose of spent fuel from nuclear reactors in a cost-effective and safe fashion.

While most environmentalists are kind folks who live modest lives and enjoy hiking on the weekends, there is a dangerous trend towards celebrity environmentalism amongst modern American society. These douchebags fly around in gulfstreams, live in huge mansions that no doubt destroyed huge swaths of the landscape to construct, and might show up in a Prius at some awards ceremony to show how "compassionate" they are about the cause that is in-style that week. Al Gore is one of these hypocritical assbags, who lives in a mansion in Nashville, but tells all the rest of us commoners that we need to reduce our carbon footprint. In an apparent PR stunt, Gore installed a bunch of "green" fixtures in his mansion, but the fact that the guy consumes way more resources than the average Joe is still apparent.

So the problem with nuclear waste is that we don't have a place to dump it, and it might get in the hands of terrorists. I say put it on Al Gores's lawn since 1) It will show how committed he is to reducing CO2 emissions and inflate his already massive ego, and 2) He'll be able to scare off any potential terrorist by boring them to death with his recap as Vice President or how the 2000 election was rigged against him. This might have the fun-filled consequence of bombarding Al Gore with gamma rays, thereby turning him into some sort of Gore-Zilla. Just thinking outside the box here.

What If There Was an Assassination Attempt And Nobody Cared

Recently, there was an attempt by the Taliban on President Karzai's life in Kabul. While the scant media devoted to the topic focused on it being a "propaganda victory" for the Taliban, Cannoneer #4 suggests we should be ridiculing our enemy for incompetence. I certainly agree with him and understand that the spread of ideas is an important part of our overall strategy. But do people care about what is going on Afghanistan? A milblogger from Afghanistan suggests that the American people pretty much don't. From Bouhammer:

My feelings are that this year will continue to build on the trend of each year being the worst one since 2001, by progressively having more violence, more brazen attacks and newer enemies to face...I just hope and pray that the American people realize this and step up as a nation to support the military and its people. Your sons and daughters are coming back in way you never imagined and they will all need your help.




It's difficult to highlight success to the American public when no one even gives a shit about the sensationalized bad news (which always receives the most press). I wager some people don't even know there is still a war there.

Registering a 1.4 on America's interest scale (pic from an Australian website)

Tuesdaze Bloggin' Roundup (29 April)

Tuesdaze Gone with the Wind. Here's some more blogs on Iraq:

• Jawa Report defines victory in Iraq
• Attackerman on the Shi'ite
• Iraq the Model on AQI teaming up with Sadr? (note: I really doubt it)
• Abu Muqawama on the main man of Ameriyah, Abu Abed
• GI Kate with info on an upcoming documentary about women in combat
• The Captain's Journal on Basra and Sadr City
• SGT Grumpy takes some pics while hanging in REMF land
• Democracy Arsenal likens the media blitz against Iran to South Park
• Mudville Gazette talks about stupid fundamentalist ideas for the military
• Chris Lejeune over at Vetvoice takes on Iraqi politics (a braver person than I)
• American Footprints is a bit skeptical of the Sunnis coming back to the Iraqi government
• Crooks and Liars highlights Paul Rieckhoff's appearance on Olbermann
• Hot Air on anti-war flicks
• Blackfive takes on Sadr
• Wired: The Danger Room talks about nifty robots in Iraq
• C-I Roller Dude on the reasons for PTSD
• Teflon Don talks about REMFs over at Jules Crittenden's blog
• Libertarian Republican talks about the surge working
• Small Wars Journal on Petraues becoming head of CENTCOM
• Navy Gal laments the sandstorm
• False Motivation says AQI might be trying to weasel back into his sector
• Kaboom on close calls
• Guidons Guidons Guidons on that O-4 to E-4 atheist scandal
• Kerry Howley on Republican congressmen banning pron in military bases (yes, pron!)

Some more items over at VetVoice:

• Sadr not Disbanding Militia
• The Morale Suppression squad strikes again!
• Different tactics for Sadr

I shamelessly swiped this tribute to awesomeness from a blog I just discovered, The Army 2.0, an IRR blogger from A-stan. Go check him out.

Iraq News (29 April)

The Good: Grug Bruno of the CFR has an extensive write up about the Sahwa movement that's worth your time. Ambassador Khalilzad drops the rhetoric on Iran and Syria about their role in Iraq. There's been an unprecedented number of airstrikes from drones/UAVs due to the recent uprising of Shi'ite militias. I knew the Air Force was good for something besides making me envious with their plush bases!

The Bad: Four of our troops were killed by indirect fire yesterday in Baghdad. The Provincial Reconstruction Teams, crucial to helping Iraqis run their country, are understaffed because the State Department doesn't have the people. Apparently, there's more military musicians that Staties.

The Ugly: Does the head of the Iranian Quds Force control Iraq? McClatchy seems to think so. Iranian influence in Iraq can be lethal due to their export of weaponry and Hezbollah-style training, and some Iraqis are getting more and more upset about Iran's role. Read about the life and times in the Green Zone...the awesomest place on the planet (not really as of late). Although the article comes off as a bit...whiny in its characterization of the denizens. I assure you I only complain 80% of the time, not all the damn time.

FTIZ (pic from Boston Globe)

More Swell News From Our Neverending Drug War

And you thought the war against Islamic Extremism would never end, at least it is justified (uh, we got attacked, remember). The Drug War has been fought ever since the days of Reefer Madness to control the "public health" of the American population and to prevent vice. Unfortunately, it has had horrendous unintended consequences such as creating availability for dangerous drugs that can actually kill you (e.g. crack, meth), and it has allowed gang-bangers and thugs from around the world to compete for the lucrative piece of the black market in America. These goons include the FARC, the Taliban, and these asshole drug cartels in Tijuana (from the San Diego Tribune):

A confrontation between rival criminal gangs left 13 dead and nine injured early yesterday in gunbattles that started along a major thoroughfare and continued near a private clinic where police exchanged gunfire with injured suspects. The shootouts were among the fiercest the city has seen in recent years. They come amid a spike in violence along Mexico's northern border as drug gangs battle one another and face off against law enforcement agencies that have stepped up efforts against organized crime. The dead appeared to be members of criminal cells linked to organized crime, but their identities were not revealed, nor would officials name any specific criminal organization, saying the investigation was continuing.

Despite what faux-populist Lou Dobbs of CNN says, America has longstanding cultural and economic ties with our friends to the south. The drug war in America has not only resulted in the destruction of our inner cities, it's caused the destruction of border cities in Mexico too. What's it all for? So Hollywood actors can buy coke from their buddy Hugo Chavez instead of down at the liquor store. What a waste...

All this is okay, because the drug war is "for our children"

What Conservative Babes Are Thinking

My weak attempt at meeting Liberal Babes bombed when they found out my old job involved clubbin' baby seals. Since that blue state sector of the population is now off-limits to anyone with access to google, I must search elsewhere. Right Wing News (h/t Sniper) has interviews with six wingnutted ladies on what they're looking for in a guy. Most seem to think that liberal guys are bunch of self-centered, whiny weenies. There also seems to be a consensus that the time-tested "dinner and a movie" is a guaranteed schnooze fest (that's girl code for the guy's not getting any). At least Ms. Holmes (pictured below) says she'll see a movie, but she'll judge the guy on what movie he picks. My future ex-wife explains:

With my guy friends, I'd want to go see something like Cloverfield, but I wouldn't want to see the Hills Have Eyes part 6. It says something about a guy when he can choose something that a girl will want to see also

Wouldn't want to see the Hills Have Eyes?!? I guess I'm SOL. I thought all chicks loved radioactive mutants going around wreaking havoc. She sounds like a hard woman to please. Sheesh. I guess I'll have to keep my midget porn collection under wraps too.

So... you wanna go protest Planned Parenthood then head back to my place

Iraq News (28 April)

The Good: U.S. forces are seriously pushing utilities, services, and humanitarian aid in Sadr City in an effort to wrest the district of Baghdad from militia control. This coincides with the offensive to take out militia thugs, 38 of whom were killed in fierce fighting yesterday amidst a Hades-like sandstorm that resulted in steel rain on the Green Zone. Vice President Hashimi and Prime Minister Maliki are finalizing political arrangements for the Iraqi Accordance Front's return to the Iraqi cabinet. Three members of the dangerous insurgent group, Ansar al-Sunnah, have been detained in Western Mosul by Iraqi Security Forces.

The Bad: Another female suicide bomber has killed three Iraqis in eastern Baghdad at a checkpoint. There are extensive details about shoddy reconstruction efforts from US-based companies that failed to finish the job as revealed by an audit (almost 900 unfinished projects). That was taxpayer dollars well spent!

The Ugly: The Iranian propaganda apparatus is becoming increasingly upset that members of the Iraqi security forces are detailing their malign role in Iraq. The Iranian government seems more and more foolish as massive amounts of Iranian caches are unearthed on a routine basis (especially in Basra, and Long War Journal has pics). There were protests in Sadr City about the ongoing military operations, with many members of Iraqi Parliament being in attendance. Where will this all go? Who knows at this point. I've come to expect the worst.

The hearts and minds offensive in Sadr City (photo from Christian Science Monitor)

Ron Paul's Gated Community Paradise

I'm no fan of gated communities. Mostly because I enjoy having derelicts sleep on my couch. But Ron Paul's people are setting up a gated community in West Texas for "freedom and liberty lovers". Anyone want a take a stab at the ratio of dudes to chicks and how frequent the Star Trek conventions are going to be? (h/t Agitprop)

Women in Action

No all you male pervs! Don't let the title of the post fool you. This is about female soldiers in Iraq in the Lioness program. Traditional Muslim culture prevents male soldiers from searching women, so it has been necessary to have all-female units deal with these situations. There's a documentary coming out about it, which the Fayetteville Observer has an extensive article well worth the read. One thing I've been flabbergasted with is the prominent feminist movement giving women serving our country very little attention. This is most likely due to the politically incorrect nature of being in the military, therefore more praise is directed towards the aging windbags in Code Pink and the patriarchal conspiracy keeping Hillary Clinton from being elected (note: Hillary Clinton shouldn't be elected prez because she is evil, not because of her gender).

Views of OIF Vets

On Iraq and politics: John Bruhns (against the war) argues that collegiate-aged war supporters who have no stake in Iraq/Afghanistan are douchey on HuffPo, while Hello Iraq (supports the Iraq strategy) argues that collegiate-aged leftistas are whiny, entitlement-grubbing socialists. This leads me to the conclusion that many vets think others our age are whiny douchebags (this is not surprising).

On the Petraeus nomination: Kokesh of the IVAW thinks the General Petraeus nomination to CENTCOM is an inevitable precursor to war with Iran. Let's not go off the deep end here...

On picture taking: SGT Grumpy snapped a picture of a palace in Iraq and will give a beer to whoever can name it. At first I thought it was Al-Faw because of the Saddam-style moat, but I think I'm wrong. He also called livin' on da FOB "depressing" after being out and about the last year in the real Iraq. I disagree, because at least I have full access to "teh internet" in relative safety in my t-walled existence. Being on a submarine...now that was soul-crushing and depressing! The only thing I had to cheer me up my last deployment was the second season of "The OC", which was rudely interrupted by 6-hour watches, a crisis with nuclear-type paperwork, or the occasional fire.

Oh the Humanity!

Damn Pirates!

A Spanish fishing boat, Playa de Bakio, has been freed from Somalian pirates, but only after a 1 million Euro ransom was paid. The Horn of Africa has seen an obscene amount of piracy and the journalistic expert on Somalia, David Axe, routinely cites problems with the troubled African country. If international shipping were to be stopped near the Horn of Africa tomorrow, I would expect worldwide food riots on Tuesday, and cannibalism in middle America on Thursday (perhaps that's a bit alarmist). Despite the fact that the decline of pirates is directly responsible for global warming (see Flying Spaghetti Monster for explanation), this egregious threat to the world economy and the right for ships to travel the high seas must be stopped. What is this, the 16th century?

Piracy: Not as cool as it used to be

Proselytizing My Crazy Beliefs To Young Soldiers

A young Specialist (an E-4) was hassled by a Major (an O-4) for his atheist beliefs in Iraq according to this New York Times article. Generally speaking, impressing political or religious beliefs in a coercive fashion is strictly forbidden and highly unethical in normal officer-enlisted relations. This is due to the fact that the authority held by officers in the military hierarchy should not fall outside of rigidly defined aspects that are essential to the mission. However, if this Major goes unpunished, that would finally set the precedent for me to force my religious beliefs on every Joe in theater!

My religion involves a modern, 21st century version of the Heaven's Gate sect, who courageously killed themselves with Nikes and bags packed in 1997 to get on the spiritually divine spaceship hiding amongst the Hale-Bopp comet. To meet up with our brothers, we will be looking at a 2009 departure to Jupiter where we will take a space truck to Alpha Centauri, which has a plethora of hot alien babes and free parking. All E-4 and below will be required to attend the weekly meetings on base or else they will have to clean latrines and they won't be allowed to use the phone bank.

Strap on those Nikes and join the party!

Iraq News (27 April)

The Good: The neighborhood of Al-Huteen in Basra is under Iraqi Army control a little over a month after the operation was launched on March 25th. General Sir Richard Dannatt, head of the British Army, defends the low-key role of the Brits in Basra, citing the necessity for Iraqis to take the lead. 4 terrorists have been killed near Samarra, one of whom was Saudi. SGT Maupin, who was missing since 2004, has returned home.

The Bad: Efforts to provide services in Sadr City (in this case trash collection) were halted due to fighting from the militia. Much like the mob controlling the union, the Mahdi Army will fight to maintain its monopoly over services in Sadr City. An Iraqi teenage girl was the victim of an abominable "honor-killing" since she had a crush on a British soldier. Many civilians killed and injured due to three suicide bombs in Mosul. The biggest city in northern Iraq has seen extensive joint operations to flush out what some have called "the last Al-Qaeda bastion" in Iraq.

The Ugly: Turkey has renewed its bombing campaign against the PKK along the Turkey-Iraq border. They launched a ground force incursion a few months back with mixed results. You'd think our ally, Turkey, would take a page from the book of COIN and realize you can't just kill your way out of problems. There's some new movie on Abu Ghraib. Seriously, how much are we going to have to hear about this disastrous issue that took place more than 4 years ago. I'm sure it'll stop once the Dems get in the White House, and the Huffingtons and Greenwalds of America revert from criticizing the government to defending its heinous policies unabashedly.

Basra under control (from AFP)

Unfunny Navy Humor and Zirkle

There's been some buzz about the imbecile Republican running for Congress in Indiana who thought it would be a swell idea to do outreach to political groups you usually don't hear about...in this case the local Neo-Nazi consortium in Indiana. Yikes, talk about a faux pas. Further investigation into Tony Zirkle's webpage indicates that the dude is a little, uh, weird:

I've been getting a flood of e-mails and phone calls, some of which include death threats, about my attempt to raise awareness of how the great porn dragon inspires Jews into pornography and prostitution and then, like the snake he is, turns the public against the Jews. Some have questioned whether there is any link to Jews and porn-prostitution.

Ah yes, the great porn dragon. Which seeks to undermine the very fabric of humanity in a sea of Chinese-made DVDs featuring fisting, DP, and sub-par storylines and cinematography.

Anyways, if you check out Tony Zirkle's "About" portion of the site, the guy went to the Naval Academy back in the late 80s. I have nothing against the fine Annapolis institution or its graduates, but as anyone in the Navy who did NOT attend the Academy knows, any discussion with a ring-knocker will involve the most schnooze-inducing conversation equivalent in pain level to discussion about the hottest babe on The Golden Girls. Academy grads love nothing more than talking about the academic rigors, those rough "plebe" years, and the awesomeness of their football team. Zzzzzzz. To counter all these years of verbal abuse I thought it would be funny to send out information about this unsavory Zirkle character asking my Academy buds if they were of the same indoctrination. Unfortunately, the jest did not go over well and I got an earful about how Zirkle was not really a true midshipmen.

I guess when your time on deployment is short, your temper becomes short as well. But if we can't share a laugh based on the mutual humiliation of others, is that a life really worth living? I say no.

McCain Courts the Coveted Rick Astley Vote

To fend off the GOP's uncool image, McCain has solicited the support of Utah's favorite drug warrior, senator, and crooner: Orrin Hatch. From the Salt Lake Tribune (h/t Crooks and Liars):

Hatch - a Utah Republican who won a platinum award for helping co-write lyrics for a song that sold more than a million records - crafted a tune called "Together Forever" for the presumptive Republican nominee. "Forever together / America is the land we're fighting for / There's a time in history / for a hero's destiny / together forever more," says Hatch's song.

I hope Sen. Hatch isn't in charge of the oversight of copyright legislation, because "Together Forever" was originally a Rick Astley Tune. The lyrics are as follows:

So don't stop me falling

It's destiny calling

A power I just can't deny

It's never changing

Can't you hear me, I'm saying

I want you for the rest of my life

Together forever and never to part

Together forever we two

And don't you know I would move heaven and earth

To be together forever with you

Why doesn't the GOP just incorporate soundbites from the greatest decade of music, the 80s? That would win over the hipsters.

I had a mancrush on Rick Astley before it was cool!

Iraq News (26 April)

The Good: Sadr took a step back from his "open war" comment last week and urged his Mahdi Army followers not to target other Iraqis. The mosques in Sadr City forbade attacking other Iraqis during Friday Prayers. The Prime Minister has outlined what the Mahdi Army should do to avoid further confrontations. Time discusses the juggling involved between the main Sunni bloc, the Iraqi Accordance Front, coming back to the cabinet due to Maliki finally getting tough on Shi'ite militias.

The Bad: Another oil pipeline has blown up south of Baghdad. Difficult to say whether it was insurgent caused or just an accident. Oil exports were down for Iraq in March, however revenue increased due to record high costs for that sweet, sweet crude. Despite the fact that the new US embassy is a complete oversized abomination and total waste of taxpayer dollars, it can't even house all the employees! I'm sure the Kuwaiti contractor that made a killing off this thing is shedding some crocodile tears about that.

The Ugly: The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Admiral Mullen, had some pretty harsh words for Iran. Some "unnamed" sources in the intelligence community say Iranian arms shipments haven't increased, but that is not the conventional wisdom. Malign Iranian influence is a serious problem in Iraq...but making sharp rhetoric about a potential military conflict?!? Is that really smart with the current conditions...I'm not so sure. There's an interesting story about an Iraq vet who is taking 22 credits a semester while writing a book (a hard worker)...maybe it's time for a new GI Bill?

What Iranian weapons, you crazy Americans?

What Could've Been

You ever wonder what life in your 20s would've been like if you hadn't exposed yourself to the busload of nuns in your teenage years? Or if you never developed that meth habit which keeps you from top-notch employment? Well you probably would've looked a lot like these young successful people. From Fortune, and the "Faces of the Future" series:

Julie says: "I am extremely 'client facing,' to the point that I spend more time in the client's office than at an IBM office. It is exciting to be representing IBM to a client so early on in my career."


Ms. Julie, your overexuberance for the mundane should cause some level of despair. Be weary of that "Bad-Boy" boyfriend who's going to run up all your credit cards to buy jewelery for his stripper girlfriend he keeps on the side. You will never be privy to this as you are working 70-90 hours a week.

Anshul says: "Imagine a job where you have experts in fields as diverse as computer security, optimization, data analytics, experimental game theory and supercomputers sitting in the same building."


Mr. Anshul, while we wager you are a pretty smart dude, there is no need to discuss the complexities of your job in a social-like setting. See those chicks you just scared off because you talked about how you were one of the original coders for Linux? They were totally unimpressed. They only thing guaranteed this evening is that you are going to get a wedgie by those meatheads playing pool.




Brooke Says: "From the minute the show begins, I am running from one dance to the next, quickly changing from one costume to another."


So... I may have just lost all my money at craps, but you look like you know how to party! They say women like to reach out and do charity work...I could be that charity! Your place or my car?




Sorry, but happy and satisfied people really make me angry.

Fobbitude

Accurate description of LT Nixon, except I always forget to wear my pants

For those of you who haven't been in the military, soldiers deployed to Iraq are seemingly divided into two broad characterizations: grunts and REMFs (or Fobbits). Grunts are the guys who go outside the wire, mingle with the locals, and engage the enemy. REMFs (Rear Echelon Mother Fuckers) are the personnel with jobs on the FOBs (forward operating bases). I was always interested in this military sub-culture, since there's nothing like it in the Navy (everyone pretty much has to go out to sea). Grunts are justifiably pissed off at people in the rear (see Acute Politics and SGT Grumpy) over what they perceive as a lack of respect. From what I can glean, soldiers outside the wire come back to sprawling FOBs only to have REMFs bitch at them for uniform violations (this should not be a priority in a war zone), taking up too much time in the MWR internet trailer, and using all the hot water. I suspect that front-line soldiers would also get pissed at REMFs telling ham-fisted tales of glory about their time in Iraq. I'm removed from all this, because I'm setup in the emerald city, which has a very civilian mindset. But I would hope that folks in support roles (like mine) have a little more respect for the people doing the hard time and keeping them from getting blowed up. Of course, I'm a sailor, so people don't judge me much and usually wonder what the fuck I'm doing in Iraq. I still am trying to get an understanding of Army culture and any insight would be appreciated.

Iraq News (25 April)

The Good: More excellent embedded reporting from Michael R. Gordon of the NY Times. This one's about our military providing medical aid to residents of the southern portion of Sadr City. On the political front, the Iraqi Accordance Front (Sunni bloc) will return their ministers to the government, since they see the Prime Minister being tough on Shia militias and not just out to marginalize Sunnis. The reconstruction of the Al-Askari mosque in Samarra is helping with reconciliation. This was the mosque bombed by terrorists in February 2006 that caused a disastrous increase in ethnic reprisal killings throughout Iraq. Oh yeah, for our Aussie allies and drinking buddies, it's Anzac Day.

The Bad: Despite progress in Basra, the plan to withdraw UK forces is on hold. One of the Marines killed in Basra was a Texas A&M alum, and there's a heart felt story here. There's tension growing in Kirkuk over who will control the city. The oil-rich city has long been a troublesome issue, as the Kurdish region thinks they should get it, but the Arabs and Turkomen think they should have authority over it as well. This was one of the key issues in the Iraq Study Report back in 2006, and it has yet to be resolved.

The Ugly: Despite Muqtada al-Sadr hanging out in Qom, the Sadrists are seeking to badmouth Iran to strengthen their nationalistic image. They have even accused Iran of sending proxies to undermine the Mahdi Army and tarnish their images. What a mess! Also, the SIGIR says the Iraqi Security Forces ain't looking too good.

A strange choice for a photo of the Prime Minister from WaPo

Oh No, Al-Qaeda Falls on Hard Times in Public Relations

The LA Times has a story about how Muslims are becoming more disenchanted with Al-Qaeda:

Such rifts have been emerging for several years, but they have become increasingly contentious lately, in cyberspace and on the streets of some Arab countries. In addition to Zawahiri, Al Qaeda leaders, including Bin Laden himself, have gone on a public relations offensive. In October, Bin Laden asked followers for forgiveness for the deaths of civilians in Iraq.

The rise of the Awakening movement in Anbar, Diyala, Baghdad, and Salah Ad-Din has been quite significant in my mind, as it shows that more moderate Muslims are, not only going to despise Al-Qaeda, but they are going to actively combat their brand of sick fuckin' brutality. It's good to see that people have taken note in other Arab countries in the Middle East and North Africa, where much of Al-Qaeda's recruiting base is located. Who would've thought that massacring civilians would generate bad public relations?

Right-wing types often criticize Muslims for not taking a more proactive stance against terrorism. But the LAT article mentions a new anti-extremist group known as The Quilliam Foundation has just been launched to combat extremist interpretations of Islam. My hats off to them!

Die

A Smug Outlook in the Blogosphere

I advocate maintaining a smorgasbord of politically-ranging blogs in the ole Google reader to get a wide spectrum of idears. I'm actually quite liberal on some issues, and it's good to at least know what the other side of the fence is thinking. While many of my comments out in liberal land could be chastised as troll-like, there's a certain sense that many of these prominent lefty blogs come off as a bit...smug. Not so much that they want to prosecute people like me of thought crimes, but there's a certain self-assured tone to it all that sort of creeps me out. A recent Dissent article on the left-wing blogosphere is a total stroke fest that confirms some of my suspicions (h/t to a liberal blog that isn't snooty Obsidian Wings):

I realized how deeply the intellectual landscape on the left has changed over the last few years, and how deeply it has changed for the better. I'm talking about a new breed of liberal writers who have emerged on the web—a network of writers who are bringing together reformism and idealism in a way we haven't seen in many years. These writers are exciting because they're unapologetically, un-defensively liberal, and because their liberalism isn't the cautious, hesitant, scared-of-its-own-shadow, skim-milk liberalism that we've all gotten used to. It's a militant liberalism, of a kind we haven't seen in decades.

How bout getting off your knees there for a minute, buddy! All this is going to do is create a more snooty atmosphere on teh internet, where pundits talk about how they rode their bike to work for Earth Day, how many phone numbers they got at a club in DC, and other snooze-inducing drivel that clogs up the net. Society is a sewer, and the best way to highlight that in a logical manner on the internet is to be a self-deprecating wreck who has a lifestyle equivalent of the homeless squeege guy who smokes cigarette butts found on the sidewalk.

An analogy in the Navy would be similar to when a new junior officer shows up on board. To prevent him from later becoming a pompous douchebag, he is usually subjugated to repeated humiliation with ass-grabbing shenanigans and verbal tongue-lashings for fucking up from both other officers and enlisted sailors (note: it was way more harsh in the "Old Navy"). This will ensure his proud membership in an alliance of bitterness and cynicism later on in his career. Due to the self-correcting nature of blogs, I say the same type of sardonic humor is true to the world of blogging, lest every post become some boring ass Facebook session about the party last night at Scooter's.

But, hey...that's just my asshole opinion, whadya all think? I just don't want people I know ending up like this self-righteous clown.

Dude, I am so like the Jesus of the Blogosphere

Fem Bot Fantasies One Step Closer to Fruition!

An ex-marine has created a "Bum Bot" to chase away transients from his establishment in Atlanta (H/T Jules) . I applaud the man's ingenuity! But, due to the malaise that male-female interactions have been suffering due to overzealous expectations, confusion, and lousy intimacy, I'm saving my money up for the female version.

Bum Bot 2.0 will be more anatomically correct

Iraq News (24 April)

The Good: Four Iranian-trained militants were killed in a US raid north of Baghdad and five were detained. Despite the fact that Iran repeatedly denies any complicity in aiding militia activity in Iraq, the facts on the ground prove otherwise. While I don't advocate open conflict with Iran, it must be acknowledged that much of their activity is illicit. Lt. Gen. Austin, #2 commander in Iraq, discusses ongoing operations describing Al-Qaeda in Iraq remaining the #1 threat. There's also some chatter about one of Saddam's henchmen, Izzat Ibrahim Douri, being captured by Iraqi forces...unfortunately it's probably BS.

The Bad: The humanitarian situation continues to get worse in Sadr City. If only the small percentage of militia thugs making trouble would lay down their weapons, some supplies would be able to get in there. And the rockets red glare in Baghdad (700 fired in last month alone)...good thing I'm a professional in cowardly hiding.

The Ugly: General Petraeus has been selected to lead CENTCOM, which would mean he is responsible for the entire region (including Afghanistan). Also, General (select) Odierno has been assigned to lead Iraq...after just getting back from being in charge of operations on a 15 month tour. Makes me glad I'm not a General. Some have speculated that this may be to take on a more aggressive stance towards Iran. Also, the Iraqis want to build an amusement park in central Baghdad. Sounds like good times, but there is probably more pressing issues that must be addressed before this can happen.

Disneyland comes to a war zone

Megan McArdle's Snide Take on the Military

There are different roles in this complex web of society. Some people are destined to be sipping on lattes while tapping out blog posts that influence the political world in some swanky NYC neighborhood. While others are fighting tooth and nail in Sadr City to prevent chaos erupting in the rest of Baghdad (and preventing me from getting dead). Certainly we can respect each other and our various lot in this world. Megan McArdle is one of those smart types, whom I respect. But when she equates the military with some creepy all-boys club that is hellbent on abusing power, I must take offense (h/t Counter Column):

But as the Milgram experiments show, most people given unlimited power over other human beings tend to abuse that power unless there are adequate institutional safeguards against us. We are natural bullies. And in mobs, we quite often make each other worse. Military culture fights this natural tendency with a pretty rigorous code of conduct--but in the end you've got a bunch of boys out on a corner with big guns. There's only so much that a code of conduct can do.

It is disturbing that snooty Ivy-league types find it so necessary to denigrate the military. The logic of her argument must be "over my head", and what did we ever do to you? In a time of recession and increasing costs for veterans health care, I predict there will be competition amongst various special groups to deny veterans benefits so that taxpayer dollars can be spent in a fashion that will benefit other portions of the population who have a larger voting capacitance (e.g. The Free Burgers for Fatsos Fund). This is what you get with a government with zero principles that only cares about winning votes.

Damn, I've been beating up on the left, and I don't want to offend my lefty readership! Time to throw out a blog-bone. Here's one... that "Bring it on!" shit Condi said in Baghdad about Sadr was completely devoid of any diplomatic foresight and reckless. More here.

Jewel to Provide Technical and Intellectual Expertise to Save the Planet

The fact that celebrities often have the impulse to step out of their roles of doing coke on the Sunset Strip and consuming massive amounts of resources in the urban jungle of Los Angeles and wade into the world of politics has always made me bitter. I'm all for people speaking their mind, but do these ill-informed, plastic surgery frankensteins deserve a freakin' congressional hearing? Politico has the scoop on politicians in Washington being wooed by "star power":

Even the celebrities themselves are often surprised at the way politicians slobber over them. When Jewel first testified before a Senate committee last year, she thought, “Gosh, they don’t want to talk to me — I’m a songwriter,” she said during a recent interview with Politico. “There are professionals who know the information and statistics. But I was just brought in. “I had a naive belief that politicians were above being impressed by star status, and I was very disappointed,” she continued, laughing. “But I guess it makes sense. Everybody is just human. I was shocked — I thought they’d weigh things based on facts, not lobbying.”

Aw geez. Even our not-so-trusted political class is swooning over celebrities. And how much hubris can these megastars contain in their swiss-cheese brains to think that they are the most important people on the planet. At least when Brad Pitt talks about whatever the fashionable "cause" is for the week, he's got some good movies to back himself up (Seven, 12 Monkeys). But, as for Jewel, her music makes me wish disco and Cher were back in style.

Jewel to update Congress on 75-point plan for nuclear non-proliferation...and to sing a song about birds

Iraq News (23 April)

The Good: Depending on where you get your news, the conference with Maliki and countries in the region could either be a smashing success or a total bust. This Saudi newspaper seems stoked that Maliki is finally taking on the Shi'ite militias that have their mitts all over the place in Iraq, but if you get your news from the WaPo, you're going to get the impression that it was a big waste of time. Only time will tell, but even Iran is pleased with the crackdown on Shi'ite militias. It's looking like Sadr is becoming more and more isolated diplomatically. More detainees have been released from Camp Bucca (the biggest US-run detention center), which is viewed as an important part of the reconciliation process as most of the detainees are Sunni. The casualties keep mounting for the enemy in Sadr City as well. Don't believe the hype that the US is targeting civilians, as people running around launching mortars and rockets don't fall under the traditional definition of "civilian".

The Bad: Speaking of Sadr City, this AP article talks about the despair felt by the residents. It's important to get services, food, jobs, and reconstruction to this sector with great haste or else these people will still be sympathetic to the militia. Two marines were killed yesterday by a suicide bomber near Ramadi. Also, another female suicide bomber in Diyala province has killed 6 policemen. The increasing use of female suicide bombers is increasingly troubling, as much of the Iraqi culture (so I'm told, I could be wrong) is adverse to searching women at checkpoints. Unfortunately, terrorists aren't so modest.

The Ugly: More from Zawahiri on how he hates Hamas and Iran. He also calls on jihadists to unite behind the Islamic State of Iraq (ISI), which is led by the Egyptian, Al-Masri, and is public enemy #1 in Iraq. This is one case where the axiom of "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" does not hold true.

Maliki hangin' with sheikhs in Kuwait that could buy and sell my sorry ass

When Peace Thugs Attack

Zombietime does a good job of characterizing some of the uglier sides of the protest culture. Eric Dondero at the Libertarian Republican had video of a woman getting assaulted by some Trostkyite in a beret. And now, the Gathering of Eagles has an account posted of how a family got attacked by some unruly peace protesters:

Seeing the escalating tension across the street, the veteran and his wife crossed over, leaving their three youngest children on the other side for safety while they went to retrieve their eldest son. Two of the female ‘peace’ protesters then attacked the veteran’s wife. When the veteran pulled one of those attackers off his wife he was jumped by four or five of the ‘peace’ people and knocked to the ground where they held him while beating him and smashing his eyeglasses.

The fact that peace and love people would resort to violence seems quite hypocritical. Obviously, protests are a necessary part of the democratic process, but resorting to violence falls on that slippery slope. If anyone wants to partake in the "glory" of where politics and violence mesh, swing by Iraq where kidnappings, assassinations, and extortion are rife within the political apparatus. So that's why I won't even support a face-punching of a group with a despicable ideology such as the Westboro Baptist Church.

What current event can't be explained with a Megadeth tune

China Joins the Brown Shirts

A cohort of mine, who once lived in Beijing, informed me that China's Communist Party (CCP) maintains "blog monitors" who readily patrol teh internets looking for people who say nasty things about China. They will usually claim they are a British or Aussie and talk about why the communist regime is "super awesome" in a covert fashion. I'm hoping to attract some of those psyop monitors to this blog amidst a massively embarrassing string of protests against the Olympic torch to allow the hilarity to ensue. The blog China Sucks Dick probably receives ample attention, and I want to partake. Here's some insight from The Telegraph on China's Cyber Brownshirts:

More than 30,000 Chinese "cyber police" surf the internet every day and have blocked thousands of sites that are deemed offensive or critical of the authorities. In addition, hundreds of officials go "underground" to take part in online discussions with the aim of subtly steering debates in support of the authorities.

Perhaps China should spend less time waging an information war and more time having restraint in beating the shit out of Tibetan monks to improve their image.

You posted bad things about China on Stuff Asian People Like!

Tuesdaze Bloggin' Roundup of Iraq (22 April)

All the news that's fit to link:

• This Ain't Hell talks about women kicking ass around the globe
• False Motivation reflects on his time in Baqubah
• Countercolumn refutes that lengthy NY Times article on Military Analysts
• Mudville Gazette makes fun of the Air Force
• Jon Soltz talks about the Pentagon spin machine
• SSGT Dad says letting people with felonies in the military could be a good thing (I agree)
• Abu Muqawama disses O' Hanlon
• Deborah Haynes on that nasty sandstorm in Baghdad
• Attackerman on vets w/PTSD
• Iraq the Model on AQI losing
• Long War Journal on the troubles with Sadr
• Wonkette drops the snark on troops with felonies
• The Captain's Journal on Iraq and Iran
• Little Green Footballs on Iranophobia
• Juan Cole on the overblown "Al-Qaeda in Iraq" moniker
• Argghhh! makes fun of Al-Qaeda
• Blackfive on Al-Jazeera English
• Jawa Report with Sen. Reid walking out of brief w/vets
• Obsidian Wings on Hillary and MoveOn
• Talisman Gate dissects the Al-Baghdadi recordings (Islamic State of Iraq fraudulent spokesman)
• The Tension with groovy combat camera footage from Sadr City
• The Danger Room on political counter-insurgency
• Intel Dump on the COL Collins (ret.) report
• A Soldier's Perspective talks about trolls
• Reason makes more fun of Zawahiri
• Matthew Ygleisas on a RAND report that says 20% of vets have some level of PTSD
• Iraq the Purgatorium ain't buying what I'm selling, a true free thinker
• Army Girl discusses emotions and Iraq
• Rows of Burnished Steel on maintaining a Navy but raising an Army (new blog alert!)
• Hello Iraq has info on sending a thank you letter to P4
• Zen Traveler ruminates about the sandstorm in Baghdad
• Iraq Partii is back in the states, but stuck in the machine
• Michael Totten on working with the tribes in Anbar
• Libertarian Leanings on fighting the Mahdi Army
• Crooks and Liars on the issue that will never go away for some...Abu Ghraib!
• The Sniper with the scoop on Ahmadinejad being a truther
• GI Kate is looking for female vets for a documentary
• USO Girls have some a photo and bio of a young PFC
• Iraq Pundit on Dr. Chalabi, the guy you love to hate

Some VetVoice Stuff I did:

• Navy LT disgraces herself
• Bring back the Draft? What!

Cheers!

Iraq News (22 April)

The Good: Currently, there is a conference going on in Kuwait with Iraq and all of its neighbors, which Condi (Secretary of State) is attending. Prime Minister Maliki is calling for debt relief and more help to curb terrorism in Iraq (Reuters has the highlights of his speech). Seems like he may have taken a subtle swipe at Iran when he called for the neighboring countries to do more to strengthen their borders to prevent terrorists from streaming across the border, but it was probably directed at Saudi Arabia or Syria. The politics of this part of the world continues to befuddle me at times, and I just hope people stop shooting each other so we can leave and the Iraqis can have some semblance of peace.

The Bad: A female suicide bomber has killed 4 Sahwa members in Baqubah. This comes at a time when Al-Qaeda guy #2, Zawahiri, has called for Muslims to hurry to Iraq for the battlefields of Jihad, citing an "imminent victory". The fact that Al-Qaeda in Iraq is using female suicide bombers in their brutal campaign highlights a certain sense of desperation and not much of a "glorious jihad". Two US soldiers were killed in Salah ad-Din province.

The Ugly: Mastermind of the brutal "Anfal Campaign", which massacred thousands of Kurds in the 80s, has gone on hunger strike while awaiting the gallows, which will ensure his executioners have an easy time getting the rope around his skinny neck...I guess. Chemical Ali, you're an asshole! Also, SECDEF has chastised the Air Force for dragging ass in getting their UAVs off the ground. Gates is pissed because he believes some of the brass still think we're fighting the cold-war against those darn commies. Usually, things like this wouldn't be said in such a public manner with the press lurking, which indicates that the SECDEF is really, really pissed at the Air Force (don't worry zoomies, LT Nixon still loves you).

Who would've thought being on Death Row would be bad for your nutritional health

Hillary Goes from Jane Fonda to Dr. Strangelove!

If Hillary Clinton was once a die-hard leftista burning her bra at Wellesley College, it certainly wasn't evident in her interview with Olberman last night (h/t Hot Air):

"We used [deterrence] very well during the Cold War when we had a bipolar world and what I think the president should do and what our policy should be is to make it very clear to the Iranians that they would be risking massive retaliation were they to launch a nuclear attack on Israel," she said.

I have nothing against Israel, but threatening nuclear war on their behalf seems just a tad bit hawkish. Is Hillary trying to bring about the "end of times" in some eschatological orgy of rapture? I hope not, because all that would result from a nuclear war is a society based on cannibalism and barbarism as we scrounge for the few remaining resources, and the only thing beneficial that could come out of nuclear apocalypse would be a make-shift Thunderdome where young female participants would fight in Xena-style warrior gear.

I'm no expert on Middle Eastern affairs, but it seems most of the Arab states are no fans of the Iranian theocracy. But, they fear hawkish American threats towards Iran as a path towards a massive regional conflict not seen since the Mongols last came through. Ironically, there's an LA Times article about the Persians closely watching our election. At a time when their economy is in the shits, and our Ambassador in Iraq seeking another round of security talks with Iran, shouldn't we a little more diplomatic in our approach. While nefarious Iranian influence in Iraq, Lebanon, and elsewhere signifies an exceedingly complex diplomatic problem, this isn't exactly the Cuban Missile Crisis in the desert.

Forget dodging sniper fire, Hillary, try living through Nuclear Winter

Shameful Habit Now Good For You

Is there anyone that didn't spank it to this scene from Fast Times like Judge Reinhold?

Success! It seems all those times that young boys run off to the bathroom with their mother's Victoria's Secret catalogs are paying off with huge health benefits. From the BBC on why masturbatin' is good for you (thanks Jules):

Australian researchers questioned over 1,000 men who had developed prostate cancer and 1,250 who had not about their sexual habits. They found those who had ejaculated the most between the ages of 20 and 50 were the least likely to develop the cancer.The protective effect was greatest while the men were in their 20s. Men who ejaculated more than five times a week were a third less likely to develop prostate cancer later in life.

So much for the crazy stories about growing hair on your palms that your folks tell you to prevent embarrassment while they host dinner parties. Anyways, I also came across a strange website called "Take the Action Corporation", by way of World-O-Crap, which is dedicated to stopping the heinous sin of onanism. According to this preachy website, the reason masturbation is so bad for you can be summed up in some gospel-like, scientifically-unproven bullets which include: You waste your valuable time on masturbation, Destroys your marriage or your relationship with your partner, and simply Masturbation destroys your health. This preposterous website then proceeds to talk about how Yoga or some other Age of Aquarius type crap is what you should be doing as opposed to batin'. I take issue with the proclaimation that you should be doing it with your partner as opposed to playing with yourself. Some poor souls are destined to not have partners until science can invent a anatomically correct robo-babe. Plus, the fact that guys in the workforce spend hours schwackin' it is absurd. Don't they know that we are pros at it by the time we hit high school?

All those wasted kleenexes!

Brother, Can You Spare a Job For a Vet?

It seems veterans are having difficulty finding employment after they get out of the military (h/t The Captain's Journal). This is most likely due to the fact that employers think they are going to flip out one day and start shooting up the place with all that "PTSD running through their head" (highly unlikely), or if they are reservists or in the Guard they are going to ship out to Iraq/A-Stan in the future (much more likely). I thought veterans would be an employer's wet dream as any personnel over the rank of an E-2 have some level of managerial abilities. Also, they have a keen sense of dealing with bullshit all the time in a timely and hostile fashion. This indicates a lack of understanding amongst employers that you just "follow orders" in the military, when the actual dynamic of the day-to-day routine is much more complex and nuanced. While legislation that would force private employers to hire vets might be a bit intrusive, a cultural enlightenment campaign from respectable veterans organizations may help nip this in the bud. That and the American economy needs to stop sucking so much ass.

Youngsters Smokin' Reefer Threatens Civilization

One issue that prevents me from being allowed to trumpet the "conservative" credentials is that I don't care if other people choose to engage in the victimless crime of drug use. Sure, Uncle Sam has a zero drug-use policy in the military as evidenced by frequent urinalysis tests, so I don't advocate for anyone in uniform to get high. But really, the Jawa report usually has insightful posts about the international terrorist threat, and this post about UC Santa Cruz students smokin' the doober on 420 day struck me as a little off from the normal context of their postings. To summarize my logic:

• Islamic extremists plotting attacks to murder civilians on a worldwide stage = threat to civilization
• College kids getting stoned on 420 day = a bunch of youngsters with the munchies playing bongos for 3 hours

The distinction is not subtle.

After one hit of the demon marijuana, Mary wanted to travel to Afghanistan to wage jihad

Iraq News (21 April)

The Good: Arab Jabour is located south of Baghdad and was once safe-haven for terrorists and other undesirables. This made life a living hell for its residents. Due to the surge strategy of US/Iraqi combat operations followed by a rigorous "Sons of Iraq" program, the place has completely turned around. AFP has been running some interesting stories on what has taken place and here's one about a butcher. 40 militia fighters have been killed in combat operations in the southern Dhi Qar province...so much for the "uprising" there. Kuwait is thinking about opening an embassy in Baghdad's Green Zone. Apparently the diplomatic pressure from Iraq and the U.S. finally got into their heads. They're probably not going to forgive any Saddam-era debts though.

The Bad: Michael R. Gordon's latest on civilians being killed in firefights between US/Iraqi forces and militia thugs. It should be noted that the Shi'ite militia fighters are a lot less caring about civilian casualties than we are. Speaking of the Mahdi Army, Sadr's call for open war is dissected at the Long War Journal. The LWJ's portrayal that the ceasefire is pretty much over is pretty damn accurate. Also, the Mahdi Army is refusing to disband, and it looks like violence will continue, albeit they will take a lot more casualties than US/Iraqi forces. It didn't have to be this way...

The Ugly: Secretary of Stae, Condoleeza Rice, came by Iraq to encourage more Arab embassies to open and to praise the Iraqis for cracking down on militia goons. Of course, Iran didn't hesitate to chime up about America...this time with something about "Iranophobia". What that means can only be understood in the bizarre reality that exists in the minds of Ahmadinejad and friends. Where the holocaust was a conspiracy, theocracy is the best form of government, and Iran doesn't ship weapons across the border into Iraq.

Diplomatic Schmoozin' in Baghdad

The Truth About Bars

Quite possibly the most candid and hilarious version I have ever seen of current bar culture. Time was you could sit down at a bar and bitch about getting laid off from the paper factory with a Yuengling and a shot of Old Grandad. Now it's become MTV Spring Break except more intellectually vapid. GI Kate has the post here and it is excellent.

The Collapse

More dumb Sunday ramblings...

As Americans, we long ago established a constitution and fought a war against our imperial masters that would enable prosperity by ensuring the average citizen had the right to life and liberty. No longer would we be virtual slaves to some nobleman or monarch, and we were free to pursue an existence that we saw fit, provided it fell within the rule of law. This framework is necessary for the collective undertaking of building a nation and culture, as a variety of different individuals and their expertise are necessary to a productive society. No one person can have all the know-how for the ever evolving complexity of our modern world. Over time, our freedom to prosper became synonymous with a freedom to vegetate and languish, and a freedom from the burden of life.



Politicians responded to this plea from our citizenry by making promises that they could never keep and our nation could never afford. A laundry list of programs provided by the "benevolent" state ensured that we would be beholden to our masters in suits and ties speaking from the pulpit. Taxes were increased in this vicious cycle of dependence and their corporate partners would ensure they could sell people things they could never afford by allowing government protection to charge such usury on debts. This cycle of being cared for like children, while having a mechanized construct to throw our money away on products we didn't really need, ensured cradle-to-grave debt where we could never speak out against our masters for fear of retribution. The concept of debt to the state which wields overwhelming power would ensure that we would be shackled and allowed to play with our shiny new toys.

How long can we carry on as a nation that equates prosperity with material wealth, when we have only limited resources, and how long will this cycle perpetuate. Our society is so compartmentalized that it would be incredibly difficult to function without one another, and the politicians that sought to control us like sheep, do not have the skills necessary to produce the necessities for human existence. Meanwhile, we avoid technical knowledge that is key to our prosperity and outsource it to countries whose names we cannot pronounce. In a period of uncertainty about the future of our habitat and possible collapse of our society which binds us together, the quest for true intellect and technical knowledge becomes all the more imperative.

Who pulls the strings that keeps our flimsy nation together. Speculation could only conclude that it is the same people who wish to see us weak and stupid. This ensures that we have utter obedience to our masters for fear of the unknown. That way we can play in the sun, as long as we are all good little boys and girls, who don't step out of line.

At times, we resemble the Eloi (h/t HG Wells): playing, fucking, and ignorant to the world around us. Only to have a morlock come around and eat us for dinner.

What a Weiner!

Some annoying Naval officer named LT Weiner didn't want to serve her IA time in Iraq. Hey, LT, none of us did, but here we are. Stop making us look like jackasses. I write more about this at VetVoice. Sorry, but this bullshit pisses me off.

Iraq News (20 April)

The Good: Iraqi operations have seized control of Mahdi Army strongholds in Basra. Even the New York Times is picking up on the story. While the operations could hardly be called a "smashing success", they are ultimately necessary to clear the militia stranglehold on the population. Even the Iranians support the Iraqi-led operation in Basra. The same goes for Sadr City, where militia fighters have taken heavy casualties, but Iran doesn't like that one too much. Most likely due to all their buddies in the Special Groups being there.

The Bad: Sadr has threatened an "open war", while the mosques have blared out the call to arms in Sadr City. and Al-Masri, head of Al-Qaeda in Iraq, has called for a 1-month offensive against the US. Sadr seems to be backed up against the wall, and defeating the US military or Iraqi Security Forces in any sort of a conventional sense is highly dubious. But, an escalation of violence is in no one's interest, and will ensure things get much worse before they get better. The Iraqi government has repeatedly stated that it will only target outlaws, and it would behoove the Sadrists to come back to the negotiating table.

The Ugly: The NY Times has a huge front page piece on the propaganda-like use of retired military analysts. Man, you gotta love the Bush Administration and their handling of...everything! This is an embarrassment to the credibility of the military, but too bad it's true. I will always have a bad taste in my mouth about how the neo-conservatives used the military as cover for their political maneuverings. Ultimately, it denigrates the uniform.

Power Comes From the Barrel of a Gun (Photo From NYT)

Ride, Ride, Ride, Paul Revere

Yesterday was the anniversary of Paul Revere's famous ride (thanks to Jules Crittenden for reminding me), and today is the day when the Battles of Lexington and Concord took place against the hated redcoats. Obviously, time heals all wounds and the Brits are our allies these days, but the lessons of those turbulent times still apply. Plenty of rants can be found at this nutty blog of what the next upcoming crisis is going to be. But I'm more interested in hearing what others have to say. If you were Paul Revere what would you be hollering and warning people about?

Note: This will provide a pleasant distraction from more somber and depressing anniversaries that take place in the same week [e.g. US Embassy Bombing in Lebanon (1983), Hitler's Birthday (1889), Waco (1993), OKC Federal Building Bombing (1995), Columbine Massacre (1999), Virginia Tech Massacre (2007), uh... you get the idea]

Gettin' It On at Work, Why I wasn't Invited

By way of Wonkette, I located an article in the WSJ about campaign staffers during the election season bumpin' uglies! Considering both the Dems and Repubs are sucking at the taxpayer troff of public funding for campaign money, I find myself most pissed that these young lovebirds are getting it on at the taxpayers expense (even the Ron Paul staffer gets laid!). At least that's what I tell myself to not feel like such a disgrace. Most of my resentment comes from the fact that I'm envious for not being in a line of work where this might conceivably happen, which helps explain why I've become so fascinated with romance novels, chick flicks, and books about babies n' weddings as of late. Gotta have something to bring out that feminine side in you! My first two deployments were with a bunch of dudes, so there was no hanky-panky going on there. This deployment is a step up, since there are some ladies, but there's still a heinous ratio that would make a sausage party at MIT look like Hugh Hefner's mansion. Plus, I can't compete with the six-fig salaries that the civilian types are raking in (chicks dig uniforms my ass). But that's alright, because I wouldn't want to suffer the humiliation of working for some scumbag politician. Pride is more important than getting lucky, at least that's what I keep telling myself. Of course years of malnutrition have made me look like one of the meth addicts they just rounded up from the double-wide trailer that blew up in Eugene, OR. Ah well, at least I'm not a big douchebag.

I think my facial features come out well!

Former Navy Guy Runs For Office

No, not John McCain. Doug Denneny is a former NFO and Iraq vet running for congress in VA. We need more vets of the OIF/OEF flavor in office and less career politician types. I much more prone to vote for someone who I know had to suffer the humiliation of being an Ensign instead of yukking it up with hot young interns in DC... and that's regardless of political leanings. He has some interesting ideas on Iraq too that are worth checking out. What a novel idea! Making foreign policy the most important part of your campaign instead of bowling scores, price of haircuts, iffy tax-returns, and other schnooze-inducing issues we get from the Presidential candidates. YouTube vid is here.

Iraq News (19 April)

The Good: Despite the media's best initial attempts to make operations in Basra look bad, military forces are in control of the Hayania district, which was a Mahdi Army stronghold. Also, it seems like some of Basra's citizens are pretty ecstatic about the crackdown on militia thugs, as they are now free to sell alcohol and movies which don't contain testaments to "Teh Awesomeness" of Sadr. Sadr City operations continue, and portions of it are still being walled to keep rocket attacks out of range of the Green Zone and to increase security measures. This is good news for yours truly, but a massive reconstruction/humanitarian campaign is going to have to take shape to prevent this place from becoming Gaza Part II.

The Bad: US deaths in Iraq are now at 4,037 as one soldier has been killed north of Baghdad. Forget about the whole intra-Shi'ite troubles that have gripped Iraq the last few weeks, there's also an article from Patrick Cockburn about intra-Sunni problems. With the increase in civilian deaths from suicide bombings seen this week in the Sunni provinces of Diyala, Anbar, and Ninawa, I'm not going to try and refute that.

The Ugly: More shenanigans from Iran's leaders as they continue to denounce the reality of their nefarious agenda in Iraq. They are also not so keen on the Sadr City operations. Sounds like their Special Group proxies are feeling the squeeze. Also, Iraq wants neighboring Arab nations to forgive their Saddam-era debt. The way OPEC takes us to the cleaners on oil, I don't see that happening any time soon.

Sadr City by Night Vision (Combat Camera from The Tension)

Tasteless Imagery of Iwo Jima and Elsewhere

Tasteless or Typical?

There's been significant buzz in the blogosphere about the tastelessness of equating the famous picture from Iwo Jima with confronting global warming on Time's cover page. See Malkin, Fuzzilicious, Blackfive, and snarky Wonkette that highlight justifiably pissed WWII vets. Does global warming exist? I don't know. I asked the smartest guy I went to college with and he said it's bullshit. Of course he also works for Exxon, so there may be a conflict of interest there. Regardless of climate change, the environment is important, since there's only one of them until we can figure out how to build casinos and strip joints on Mars. But slapping a Sierra Club sticker on your SUV and watching Al Gore's "Inconvenient Truth" does not require the same fortitude as taking on a determined and well dug-in foe where thousands of your fellow Marines lost their lives.

The whole stance against the Time cover is moot unfortunately, since our consumerist culture, that's heavy on advertising and distorting the public mind, has already ruined tons of iconic images. The flag gets paraded around like a three-dollar whore on every used car commercial in America, velvet Jesuses are sold at the Tijuana border, and vendors sell 9/11 hats at Ground Zero. Collectively, I think we have been jaded. So whether the bravery of Iwo Jima gets used to pitch a political agenda or whether it gets used to sell home insurance is of no consequence. Advertisers would use imagery from Iraq if the war wasn't so unpopular and polarizing. Here's one below I found for hot pants.

(Note: I'm pretty sure I remember this airing, that shit pissed me off!)

Iraq News (18 April)

The Good: Sadr City operations are now involving Tanks N' T-Walls (Michael R. Gordon reports). Significant humanitarian assistance is going to be needed from the Iraqi government to coincide with this in order to avoid a "siege" mentality. This will also undercut support from poor Shi'ites for the militias and Iranian-backed goon squads that operate in the area. The Iraqi Accordance Front is talking about returning its ministers to the government after a months-long boycott. This is due to the Sunni bloc being pleased with the Prime Minister for taking on the thugs in the militia that "cleansed" so many Sunnis in 2006 and 2007, apparently.

The Bad: It's looking like the Sadrists will not disband the Mahdi Army on their own. Scores were killed due to a suicide bombing at a funeral for a Sahwa member in Diyala province. This comes at a time when Zawahiri (#2 Al-Qaeda asshat) has called for creating a "fortress of Islam" in Iraq. Ironically, he accuses the US with colluding with Iran, guess he doesn't get much news in the northwestern part of Pakistan or wherever the hell he's holed up. He also called Iraq a "failure and defeat" for the US. Guess he's getting his talking points from Democrat Senators (hi-yo!).

The Ugly: A nasty sandstorm gripped Baghdad yesterday, which shut down the airport, compounded respiratory illnesses, and provided cover for the enemy to conduct more attacks (I blame, you, Ms. Mother Nature). Also, a new RAND study reveals that 1 in 5 vets suffer some level of mental disorder. That makes an estimated 300,000 having psychological issues related to serving in Iraq or Afghanistan. It's funny (in a sad way) that the media always acts surprised when these studies come out. Of course to vets it is no surprise, and it serves as a stark reminder to the high cost of war. But PTSD does not necessarily imply that 300K vets are running around the woods like Rambo waiting to kill Haji, as it comes in various different forms. You might be surprised at the amount of veteran activists, media personalities, and bloggers that have been diagnosed PTSD or suffer some level of psychological disorder. Very surprised...

Looks like the Gates of Hell

Justifying the Raid on the FLDS

More on the practice I could never afford here

Coming of age during the Clinton administration instilled in me a healthy fear of the US Government using heavy-handed tactics (I understand the irony that I'm now in the military...thanks). The gestapo-like tactics and incendiary rounds used by the ATF to take out the Branch Davidians in Waco 1993, Randy Weaver's wife getting shot at Ruby Ridge, the whole Elian Gonzalez fiasco, etc. So I expressed a lot of the same anxieties as Pat Dollard did when this whole raid on the Polygamist FLDS compound was shaping up. But instead of churning up a plot with my separatist militia group, I decided to read a little bit more about it!

I would be hard-pressed to justify a military-style raid against someone for their choice of lifestyle. Even if that involves living in a compound and dressing like the characters from The Handmaiden's Tale. But Orcinus points out that clearly these women are being coerced, and their testimony and interview on Fox/CNN gives a stark sense of brainwashed abuse that any freshman Psych major could point out. There's a website dedicated to exposing the criminality of this cult called Help The Child Brides, which is worth a visit. There's personal stories of Khmer Rouge style "re-education" if any of the women act up, and a sad story of a 14 year-old girl that was married off to her step-brother. Watching the interviews reminded me of stories my aunt, who's a cop, used to tell me. She said she frequently responds to domestic abuse cases (usually phoned in by the neighbor), and sometimes the battered woman will come to the door and make excuses for her drunken, criminal of a husband. It's a phenomenon I just don't understand. That's the same impression I got from these interviews with the women of the FLDS. So are the raids justified, yeah, probably. It's upholding the law, and committing abuse isn't exactly a viable choice of a lifestyle, since it harms someone else. Any libertarian would agree with me.

Creepy Shit

Just to prove I was watching CNN, here's a commercial geared towards it's aging demographic

New Children's Book Explains Mommy's New Rack

Plastic surgery for the sake of making someone look "pretty" is one of the most egregious trends to settle into our current culture. Topics that would make a Vegas dancer blush like Botox injections, "vaginal rejuvenation", collagen, and boobjobs are seriously discussed among middle-aged ladies at book clubs. Real medical doctors, the most highly skilled profession of our time, have been upstaged by Dr. Nick types, juicing up depressed housewives with silicone in their garage. This is a complete waste of scarce medical expertise, along with a failure for an individual to accept their existence and current age, which makes this "trend" all the more heinous. Well now there's a book by some money-grubbing asshole to help kiddies deal with the fact that their own mother is soulless attention-grubber. Newsweek explains (H/T Reason):

"My Beautiful Mommy" is aimed at kids ages four to seven and features a plastic surgeon named Dr. Michael (a musclebound superhero type) and a girl whose mother gets a tummy tuck, a nose job and breast implants. Before her surgery the mom explains that she is getting a smaller tummy: "You see, as I got older, my body stretched and I couldn't fit into my clothes anymore. Dr. Michael is going to help fix that and make me feel better." Mom comes home looking like a slightly bruised Barbie doll with demure bandages on her nose and around her waist.

Sure, who am I to judge these people for making their own decisions. Fair enough. Just don't get all uppity when I call you "Frankenstein" once I see you parading down the street. This is all part of a "forever young" culture that refuses to equate age with wisdom, ignores the warnings of its elders , and will eventually self-destruct. Ah, fuck it.

That SUV isn't paying for itself. Mommy's gotta invest in her wares!

Of course, the author of the book fails to tell the story that Mommy is still a vapid soul clinging to her youth, and that plastic surgery might make Mommy look a "little funny" (see below).

Plastic Surgery Disasters (Hey Baby, you work out?)

Iraq News (17 April)

The Good: Prime Minister Maliki is schmoozing with the EU to get their help building oil infrastructure so that Europe can get their gas somewhere other than Russia. Could be a huge windfall for the Iraqi government, and whether or not they will use the revenue to improve their country remains to be seen. A press conference was held yesterday detailing the recent kills/captures of bad dudes in AQI. Long War Journal has some details, and a seized document from a US raid near Baghdad indicates Al-Qaeda's plans of striking infrastructure to disrupt the Iraqi economy, inciting sectarian violence, etc. etc.

The Bad: Turkey is allying with Iran to target their mutual enemies, the Kurdish separatist groups PKK and the PJAK. This isn't going to help Turkey get into NATO, but they really hate Kurdish rebel groups, as seen with this recent airstrike. There is some confusion over whether Iraqi Generals Mohan and Khalaf, who were commanders of the recent operations in Basra, were fired or just re-assigned. Why can't I get "re-assigned"? Time to turn up the level of incompetence to get out of here early.

The Ugly: And you thoughtthe US Navy had problems since they made clowns like me a commissioned officer, check out the Iraqi Navy. The article details how they had to essentially start from scratch post-Saddam, and with all the oil smuggling and perennial troublemaker Iran next door, sounds like they have a lot of challenges ahead of them.

PM Maliki and the EU...BFF!

Robo-Pope!

Check out these Sniper pics of The Pope in DC:


Anyone know how to order one of these bad boys on wheels?

Vote Now and Get a Shiny New Toaster!

In the 2008 campaign, behind all the gaffes and cheesy attack ads, one thing has been troubling: No candidate (except for notable goofball Ron Paul) has talked about shrinking the size of our horribly bloated government, which is already so bankrupt it's causing the dollar to go the way of the peso. The candidates are trying to sell all their wasteful programs to the taxpayer as a way to get votes. Isn't this why we have the constituition, to limit these clowns from playing Robin Hood with the might of the military behind their back? Is it time to give up on democracy and pick some random citizen out of a hat to lead our nation. I think so!

Quick everyone fleece the Government!

Moral Authority, Chickenhawks, Liberals, and Douchebags

Spencer Ackerman (that dude who got in trouble at The New Republic) has a new blog over at ThinkProgress dealing with foreign policy issues and other miscellaneous items. My views certainly don't jive with ThinkProgress, but I'm open to new ideas (I mean what the hell else am I going to do). He's got a funny post with a mock letter from one of The Kagans' kid from Iraq (note: The Kagans don't have a son in Iraq), which is a snide critique of fobbit culture. It's funny, but who is this clown, right, he's never been in the military. There was some discussion of this over at Abu Muqawama if you are interested in who is allowed to make the "chickenhawk" argument. But who is to judge "moral authority" on who gets to say what...Jesus maybe? The whole "policing" the blogosphere thing seems a little too much like some Brown Shirt campaign in Munich updated for the 21st century. Being a staunch advocate of getting and being offended on a frequent basis, I don't like the whole concept. Especially, since much more hatred should be directed at terrorist goons using the internets to create a legion of easily-influenced suicide bombers. So I say let the information and insults flow freely like Syphilis in a Reno jacuzzi.

But lefty bloggers can really annoy me sometimes. Primarily, because they like to twist your comments around to make you like 1) a dumbass, 2) some racist/ facist/ misogynist/ angrywhiteguyist, or 3) your comment being the problem with every injustice in the world...ever. So it's really difficult to engage in any sort of intelligible discussion where you might benefit from the exchange of ideas, since they're way up high on their ivory tower of self-righteousness and I'm getting wasted off Schlitz in the proverbial gutter. These people are sipping lattes and cruising around to their pilates in Volvos proclaiming to comprehend everything wrong with the world. The only problem in their life is feeling guilty as they roll up the window when the scary homeless man ask for change at the freeway exit. C'mon.

Of course not all lefties are like this, and I'm making extremely crass stereotypes. Having lived on the "Left Coast" for a large part of my meager existence, most of my friends have had left-of-center politics. And, I think Spencer Ackerman seems cool, since he has a sense of humor and doesn't fall into the douchebag category.

Well-to-do Liberal Bloggers (note: they're gonna eskimo kiss after the post is done, awwww)

Iraq News (16 Apr)

The Good: Our long-standing allies, the Brits, have praised the Iraqi Security Forces for releasing Richard Butler, the British journalist for CBS. 18 Al-Qaeda in Iraq terrorists have been detained in northern Iraq by recent US military operations.

The Bad: A string of car-bombs have killed dozens of civilians in Iraq. Yesterday, there were car bombs in Baghdad, Baqubah, Mosul, and Ramadi, which is the largest city in the usually quiet Anbar province. This comes at a time when the fraudulent spokesman for Al-Qaeda in Iraq, Al-Baghdadi, has called on Sunnis to strike "crusaders". Of course crusaders means killing other civilians for these thugs. Two of Grand Ayatollah Sistani's aides have survived an assassination attempt in Basra and Kut. Also, a reputable journalist, Michael Gordon, has reported that the Iraqi units are deserting the fight in Sadr City (pics here).

The Ugly: The State Department is getting all riled up again about mandatory assignments in Iraq. What, you thought foreign service was all about hooking up with hot babes at the Bangkok embassy? Welcome to the sand box.

The Horror in Baqubah (From Belfast Telegraph)

Damnit, Rick-Rolled Again!

TSO over at The Sniper has rick-rolled me over a blog war. Is nothing sacred anymore? I thought everyone liked the musical stylings of Rick Astley. Anyways, I'm too much of wuss for this sort of thing. Time to pull a Brave Sir Robin and bugger out.

Great News: View of America goes from Glaring Hatred to Modest Hatred

The BBC conducted a poll of 34 nations on attitudes towards world powers and America's approval ratings went from 31% on 2007 to 35% in 2008, while the negative rating went from 52% in 2007 to 47% in 2008. Obviously, there is much room for improvement.

Sure, you could say that we're aloof juggernauts like the Yankees, but that would be foolish while we are engaged in combating a worldwide terrorist campaign. The cynic in me says that domestic politics has become mired in a debate over whether we became some Stalin-like isolationist gulag (dems) or imperial crusaders trying to bring about the "End of Times" in a biblical sense (repubs). I'm no policy wonk, but I do think engaging in free trade and humanitarian relief boosts our credibility to the world. Also, more clarification of our foreign policy agenda should be dictated from the highest levels of our government so that the world understands we're not "killin' brown people", but rather countering an extreme threat to civilization and human rights. Of course America's strength has always been it's innovation in the economic sector, production capability, and it's tolerance, no need to put the kaibash on a good thing.

This Year Only One Flag Was Burned at The Annual "Death to America" Protest

Crazy Pope Conspiracies

I admit to once being a connoisseur of conspiracy theory in my younger years (an abundance of which can be found here). But when I was working in college, I questioned a co-worker whether his previous employment at the U.N. was a nefarious plot to rid Americans of their guns so that the Blue-Helmeted Gestapo could swarm America and load us into pods Matrix-style. He responded that no one at such high levels of government/diplomatic positions was that competent. After working in the Green Zone for 10-months, I have kind of confirmed this hypothesis. But without further adieu, here's my nutty Pope conspiracy theory (a random XM rant that seriously considers a Papal conspiracy is available, which Curmudgeonly & Skeptical has captured):

The Pope came to America on the premise of speaking out against pedophilia. But that's really just a mass distraction perpetuated by the corporate-owned media to allow transfer of billions of dollars from the basement of the CFR building to the Vatican for the Pope's legal defense fund. From there, the money will be converted to VaticanBucks which the Bilderberg group, in conjunction with the Trilateral Commission, will use to finance Cheney's oil-drilling rig (which operates while orbiting in space). The profits generated from the space oil rig will allow the NSA to pay off the space aliens that have been threatening to annihilate our planet with their supersonic deathray. The Pope got wind that Bush was funneling money meant for the devious space aliens, and he wants in on the agreement to resurrect the Nazi SS to combat the space aliens from the Norad base in Colorado Springs and keep the money for himself. So that, my friends, is why the Pope is really coming to America. At times like this, you have to ask yourself, What Would Xenu Do?

Look he's doing that "Sig Heil" thing, uh, rEVOLution man

Tuesdaze Bloggin' Round-Up of Iraq (15 Apr)

I'm just counting down the days at this point...I need a beer. Here's some interesting blogposts on Iraq that were shamelessly copied from my google reader to this stupid blog:

• Acute Politics has some new stuff on the Sons of Iraq
• Captain's Journal discusses the ups and downs of Basra
• The Jawa Report is not ecstatic about terrorist AP photographer being released
• A Soldier's Perspective has some info on the Native American who was KIA in Iraq having a mountain in AZ named after her
• Iraq the Purgatorium humbly acknowledges his reference in the MSM
• Zen Traveler is leaving Iraq (take me with you, sir!)
• Hot Air on the politics of the Status of Forces Agreement, on the Iraq side
• Inside Iraq with a look at Adhamiyah (neighborhood in northern Baghdad)
• Crooks and Liars on the SNL Petraeus gag
• Pajamas Media has an interview with Michael Yon
• Sergeant Grumpy with a picture that says a lot
• IraqPundit makes Juan Cole look dumb
• AgitProp slams Bush over the head with Iraq
• This Ain't Hell on operations in Sadr City
• Mudville Gazette on the implications of booze in Basrah
• Blackfive on the excellent documentary "This is War"
• Matthew Ygleisas on the problems with Sadr
• Obsidian Wings on the polarized war on the political front
• Dissaffected and It Feels So Good on the callousness some exhibit regarding US deaths in Iraq
• Libertarian Republican calls US Soldiers the best libertarians
• VetVoice on the Bush Administration gearing up for war in Iran
• Arrrggh! sticks up for Bellavia
• McClatchy Watch on the freed students in Mosul
• Libertarian Leanings on the Sadr ceasefire
• Views of a Veteran reflects on an event in Sep 2007 in DC where some hippie jackass went off the hook
• Dadmanly has some pics of the Vets for Freedom event last week
• Operation Yellow Elephant tells youngsters to drop the pom poms and Enlist!
• Iraqi Bloggers Central says Sadr is back from Iran and in Najaf
• Wired: Danger Room on an embarrassed Congressman
• Intel Dump says Petraeus "Overplay His Hand"
• Juan Cole discusses the Iraq-Lebanon comparison
• Long War Journal on US/Iraqi operations
• War is Boring on suicide bombers...in Somalia

More polished rants at VetVoice that I wrote:

• Qatar R&R sucks
• Problems with a Military Solution
• On taking down militias

Cheers!

Iraq News (15 Apr)

The Good: British CBS journalist, Richard Butler, has been freed in Basra by Iraqi Security Forces. It's funny how the New York Times headline is "2 Journalist Freed" referring to the amnesty granted to terrorist photographer, Bilal Hussein. Silly New York Times, unlike the AP photographer, Richard Butler was never caught with IED-making materials, providing forged documents to insurgents, etc. I think the distinction is not subtle.

The Bad: Damn...a very violent last couple of days. A car bomb has killed dozens at a courthouse in Baquba. 12 Kurdish Peshmerga troops have been killed in Ninawa province (home of Mosul and center of much of the terrorist-style violence in northern Iraq). 2 US soldiers were killed by IEDs. The fraudulent Iraqi spokesman for Al-Qaeda, Al-Baghdadi, has called for Sunni Sahwa members to come back and embrace Al-Qaeda. Somehow I think that they won't fall for that one again.

The Ugly: Sadr has called for the 1,300 Iraqi Forces who got canned either for surrendering to the militia or being incompetent to be integrated back into the Iraqi Security Forces. It's a lose-lose situation, because if the Ministry of Defenese doesn't, they will simply be on the Mahdi Army payroll, and if they are re-integrated, there will be more militia infestation. Christian Science Monitor has an interesting article about dealing with the problem of Sadr. It involves a lot of service-providing an aid to counter the Hezbollah-style influence the Mahdi Army wields over Sadr City.

Manning a Sadr City checkpoint...dangerous business

British Journalist Freed in Failed Basra Campaign

I never understood why American pundits always want to see everything in Iraq as a failure. Has the war gone well, no, but war is terrible. But to put every fact in Iraq into negative spin to satisfy a domestic political agenda to get the Repubs out of office is something I never quite understood. Smart folk types like Ygleisas only want to see failure, failure, and failure. Ironically, Kevin Drum has a piece on CBS a couple weeks ago seemingly gloating that the Basra offensive was a big bust. But today, CBS journalist Kevin Butler was freed after two months in captivity by militia thugs. The entire operation was conducted by the ISF and he had this to say:

"Thank you and I'm looking forward to seeing my family and my friends at CBS and thank you again," Butler told al-Askari. He described the soldiers' performance as "brilliant." "The Iraqi army stormed the house and overcame my guards and they burst through the door," Butler said. "I had my hood on, which I had to have on all the time, and they shouted something at me, and I pulled my hood off."

While it would be short-sighted to say one release of a kidnapped foreign journalist should be the premise for an entire large-scale operation, do you think pundits will even discuss this at all?

Kevin Butler Freed (H/T McClatchy Watch for the Pic)

Thoughtful Discussion of Iraq

Your probably not going to find any discussion of Iraq on this blog without every other sentence degenerating into shenanigans. But, Pajamas Media has an excellent interview with some well-respected war journalists Michael Totten, Glen Reynolds, Bill Roggio, and Jules Crittenden on Iraq "5 Years On". It's worth the listen! Mostly because they don't have some cozy domestic political agenda, but try to discuss it from an objective and truthful basis. And if that's not serious enough for you, Wired's Danger Room has more information on how to kill zombies. I think an awful lot about zombies...that shit freaks me out.

PR Fiascoes

I'm pretty thankful that I studied engineering in college and will probably settle into some boring job following this whole Navy thing. Sure there's a lot more womens in the PR/HR biz, but I wouldn't know how to deal with events like this. The first event involves an errant artillery shell fired at an Army base in Jersey that landed on some lady's house killing her cat (CNN story here). The second event involves the Ohio Highway Patrol dressing up as the KKK (Fox story here). You know someone's gonna be having a shitty day at work this Monday.

Murderous, Racist Thugs...not exactly the kind of image you want for your organization on national TV

Iraq News (14 Apr)

The Good: The Government of Iraq has ordered a crackdown on militias selling black market fuel to Iraqi citizens (about damn time). This has been a continuous cash flow for the Mahdi Army, and this move will put the squeeze on their ability to purchase weapons and payoff their thugs. They might need to stock up as the Iraqi Police have seized a cache that was concealed in a hay truck bound for Baghdad. The Iraqi Cabinet has passed the draft Provincial Elections law and it will be sent to the Iraqi Parliament. This will most likely be bitterly disputed, but is ultimately necessary for political progress in Iraq.

The Bad: A mass grave of badly decomposed corpses has been found in Diyala province, which was Al-Qaeda in Iraq central through the better part of 2007. Foreign Minister Zebari cites some problems with Iran-Iraq-US relations. It should be noted that the Iraq government's greatest fear is probably the US launching a war against Iran from Iraqi territory (can you blame the Iraqis for being so paranoid, why would they want more war?).

The Ugly: The Iraqi government has shitcanned 1,300 members of the Iraqi Security Forces for incompetence and dereliction of duty. I couldn't decide whether this was good or bad, so I stuck it down here. While it's good that the government is clamping down on militia-infestation into it's security forces, this event signifies how much of a problem that infestation is.

Iraqi Security Forces doing their thing...hopefully without sympathies to the bad dudes

Generation Y-We Suck

Burt Prelutsky writes an excellent article for Pajamas Media characterizing the 1960s long-hair, draft-dodgin', leftistas as a mere self-indulgent movement that stood on the good side of the civil rights movement, but was wrong about everything else. I sent the article to Generation X scholar, Wek of Latchkey Man, for his further analysis, since there has always been some underlying generational tension with that demographic of the population. Not without justification either, as Gen Xers will most likely have to foot most of the bill as the boomers retire off to their expensive yoga retreats to become one with the cosmos...at a very heavy cost to the taxpayer. Being born in 1980, I kind of hoped I was part of the angst-ridden generation that had good taste in movies like "Slacker" and viewed the world with a cynical eye. But, alas, I think I was born several years too late, as I am part of, arguably, the worst generation in the history of America!

At Least the Baby Boomers Knew How to Have Good Times

If you were lucky enough to avoid service in Vietnam, it seems to me like the 60s might have been a blast! Lots of sex, drugs, partying, which was followed by the economic boom in the 80s to ensure you had that nest egg set up so that you could golf on the weekends, but still have those Hendrix LPs on standby lest anyone call you a "sellout". At least these people stood for something, Gen Y doesn't stand for shit! The only common trait I have found among people my age is there undeniable love for themselves that cannot be penetrated with any sort of constructive criticism. This is the result of a terrible array of mainstream culture that focuses on the melodrama and importance of incredibly vapid personalities which can be found on MTV reality type shows. MTV used to have classics like "Headbanger's Ball" and "Beavis and Butthead" that highlighted angst and frustration in a chaotic and imperfect world. Now all I hear about are these princess types celebrating their own existence with bullshit like "Sweet 16" (what the fuck has anyone at 16 done with their life to deserve these luxuries?). No doubt, these gals are sought after by gel-haired douchebags decked out in the latest hipster fashion in a major bid for attention. People of my generation are so caught up with going to the gym, staying healthy, and not learning anything along the way, that this phenomenon will certainly propel legions of ignorant pleasure-seekers well into their old age.

Dude...seriously, just stab yourself

What the hell are we doing?!? Gen Y has nothing to show as far as cultural or intellectual achievements because of this self-absorbed paradigm that will certainly beget the downfall of civilization. As far as I am concerned, the greatest calling for our generation to actually achieve something was defeating terrorism after 9/11. I'm not saying that everyone should gear up and join the military, but recruiters can't even get the bare minimum of interested applicants according to this Navy Times article (thanks Wek!). Is this due to the national malaise that the Iraq war has caused, or is it due to this viral infection of self-absorption that has swept my generation like a modern-day bubonic plague. The fact that people aren't even interested in what's going on with foreign policy and events suggests that it's probably due to the apathy, sadly. This NY Times article frankly discusses how even thinking about Iraq has been completely pushed out of the public mind to avoid any "unpleasant" thoughts. Well, that's not very reassuring as we are probably going to be here for years, and Afghanistan even longer.

Some Gave All...

To make such broad sweeping generalizations is unfair, which I understand. And I also think it's silly to think everyone should sign up with Uncle Sam. But can Gen Y people even work a regular 9-5 job? With an attitude that they are the little darlings of planet Earth, I don't see how. Work requires an individual to shut the hell up and do what the bossman or bosswoman tells you to. I have worked a lot of different jobs, and it seems to be a common theme (that's why they call it "work"). It's not supposed to be fun, it's not supposed to be "enhancing", and it's supposed to be totally lousy (that's why you get paid). Instead, I see people moaning and groaning about how their boss is mean and doesn't recognize their full potential. Shut the hell up and get back in your damn cubicle! Is it any wonder that people are borrowing more and more money off their parents to live their high-falutin' lifestyles of partying all weekend, while text-messaging their buddies during work hours? Is it up for debate that Gen Y people want a government that will provide them with all they need to sustain their completely unsustainable lifestyles? I suggest we step out of our solipsist role where our consumer-culture makes us function like sheep and start brainstorming. But what the fuck do I know, I'm just some asshole! If you know something Gen Y has accomplished, please rebuke my vile discontent in the comments thread. Excuse me while I update my Facebook page to let everyone know how awesome and important I am. Blegh!

...and many gave none

My Retaliation Against those ex-Army Hooligans

A few days back, TSO (former Army and OEF combat vet) over at The Sniper thought it would be hilarious to send out a zinger at the Navy for all the blogworld to see. I do appreciate his image of the Village People to point out that out of all the branches, the Navy is the most "festive". As my collection of Broadway show tunes and wine magazines speaks for itself, I probably shouldn't attempt to deny this. However, at least I'm not as knuckleheaded as the United States Army. Despite the President and SECDEF calling for more troops into Afghanistan, the Army can't seem to figure out what to do with the 2,500 Marines, sent to put the whoopass on the Taliban, who have been stuck on the airbase in Kandahar for weeks. From the Baltimore Sun:

For Marines, who are accustomed to landing in a war zone and immediately going into action with their own plans, the holdup has been frustrating. Frequent changes among command leaders and unclear lines of authority have made it difficult for the Marines to win general approval for the timing, goals and extent of proposed operations.Marine operations planning, which is routinely completed in hours or days, has gone on for weeks while they await agreement and approval from above. "They invite us here ... and they don't know how to use us?" said Lt. Col. Anthony Henderson, commander of the 1st Battalion, 6th Marines. "We are trying to keep our frustration in check ... but we have to wait for the elephants to stop dancing," Henderson said, referring to the brass-heavy international command.

Way to maximize operational capacity. I'm guessing that the Army hasn't figured out how to give the Marines their "heat stress" course, has run out of reflective belts to issue, or some other "check-in-the-box" type task that is absolutely "crucial" during war time. Well at least the Marines can soak up the luxuries of livin' on the FOB.

Thank God I'm only in the Army for about 2 more months

Iraq News (13 Apr)

The Good: The Najaf curfew has been lifted and I saw no reporting of violence from the city following Sadr's brother-in-law being assassinated. Due to the government's incompetence in allowing Iraqis who helped us out to seek asylum in the United States, vets are stepping up to get the job done. Bill Roggio has all the nitty gritty of ongoing operations in Sadr City and Basra...and he doesn't even embed with the enemy like every other "mainstream" media outlet.


The Bad: The past week has been the deadliest all year for US forces, which is the result of the Sadr City operations mentioned above. Friendly fire incidents like when an Air Weapons Team set a Stryker on fire with an errant Hellfire missile doesn't help matters. The nutty Sadr flips out on SECDEF Gates about his comments that Sadr should take part in the political process in Iraq as opposed to violence.


The Ugly: A mosque has been blown up with serious casualties. This wasn't in Iraq, but in Iran. Sounds like the work of the Mujaheedin e-Khalq, a bizarre terrorist group that was once cozy with Saddam. Even though I'm no fan of Iran, I certainly don't think their mosques should get destroyed. I wonder how long it takes Ahmadinejad to blame the U.S. in some twisted sort of logic.

Whodunnit?

Obama's Indiana Comments Are Terrifying

At a San Francisco fundraiser last Sunday, Obama played on the fears of well-cultured urban people towards folks in middle America. From Politico:

And it's not surprising then they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy toward people who aren't like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.

Sure, whatever. Obama is simply playing politics here, since he is seizing on stereotypes held by city folk that people from middle America are lovable rubes who have a gross misconception of an ideal life. No worries, there. When I moved to California from the Midwest, the most common question was what was it like to grow up on a farm and if I was in-bred. I'm not characterizing myself as some whinyass victim of Bay Area elites, since it would be impolite to the people of San Francisco to discuss on this blog what we thought about them growing up. This cultural disparity in America has been around for eons, and it is not necessarily a bad thing as it makes America more cosmopolitan. So no need to get the proverbial panties in a bunch over the Senator's statement, IMHO.

However, reading what he said in Indiana to clarify his remarks was what truly scared the bejeezus out of me. From Reason:

People don't vote on economic issues because they don't expect anybody is going to help them. So people end up voting on issues like guns and are they going to have the right to bear arms. They vote on issues like gay marriage. They take refuge in their faith and their community, and their family, and the things they can count on. But they don't believe they can count on Washington.

This wordplay implies a collective submission to the enterprise of the state, while downplaying the importance of other entities (and I'm not even religious!). Even if the state bears free health care, guaranteed jobs, and smiley faces, it should still be feared as it rules with overwhelming force. Call me old-fashioned, but I thought government's role outlined in the constitution was to guarantee the rule of law, provide for the defense of its citizens, and something about delivering the mail. How far have we drifted from that document that we, as Americans, now want the government to provide everything for us in Nurse Ratched-like fashion. Are we so short-sighted that we don't see the inherent danger in granting the state such vast powers over its own subjects? Obama certainly makes a good case to need the right to bear arms at a time like this. Anyone who knows where I can stash an AR-15 with 12 boxes worth of ammo and my zombie-survival equipment, feel free to drop me a line.

Vote for the Best, Prepare for the Worst

Iraq News (12 Apr)

The Good: 13 militia thugs (probably Quds Force proxies) were killed in fighting in Sadr City. There's been some weapons video released and of course the folks on the left are decrying it as shameless Pentagon propaganda! I call feeds from Aerial Weapons Team/UAVs destroying mortar cells a way for me to get better sleep at night. It should be noted that showing militia propaganda of "civilians" being killed in American media is "acceptable" to those who have a political interest in seeing the US fail in it's mission in Iraq. 4 terrorists, believed to be associated with Al-Qaeda, have been killed by the Iraqi Army in Mosul.

The Bad: Allawi's party, The Iraqi National List, wants an apology from the Maliki government before they end their boycott (they've been boycotting as long as I can remember). Man, these schoolhouse shenanigans are certainly gumming up the works in the political arena. Ambassador Crocker says that the taxpayer-monstrosity of a new embassy is almost open for business...several months late and millions of dollars over-budget. Someone made a killing on that thing and it sure as hell wasn't the State Department or the American people.

The Ugly: Sadr's brother-in-law, Riyad al-Nuri, has been assassinated by gunmen in Najaf. Sadr spokesman, Obeidi says that the occupation forces had a role in this, but I'm not buying that since we have repeatedly said we wouldn't target Sadr's people during a ceasefire. The Prime Minister has condemned the assassination, but I'm guessing there is a lot more going on here.

Don't Forget to Look Up, Fellas

Good Times Milbloggin'

To stave off insanity, I have completely immersed myself in the blogosphere like a fobbit recluse...or a guy who still lives in his mother's basement. Milblogs are my fave, simply because they contradict stereotypes sometimes appropriated to the military of uneducated rubes at best, and a crazy cadre of Timothy McVeighs at worst. Newsweek recently discussed some milblogs, and it's good to highlight some more that are still active:

Godfather & Godmother of the milblogosphere: Mudville Gazette
Milblog database: JP's Milblogging.Com
Excellent Military Journalists that don't make America look stupid: Michael Yon, Michael Totten, Bill Roggio, and David Axe
Squid Blogs: CDR Salamander, Doc in the Box, and Yankee Sailor
Memories of Afghanistan: This War and Me
People who know more about counter-insurgency than me: Abu Muqawama and The Captain's Journal
People way smarter and less crass than me: Small Wars Journal
Proof that the military isn't a total sausage fest: GI Kate, Battle Dress U, Defiant Compliance, and Navy Gal
Iraq milblogs: Toy Soldier, SGT Grumpy, Kaboom, Badgers Forward...also Eighty Deuce and The Angry American who are outta here on the freedom bird
The Hunter S. Thompson of milblogs: Iraq the Purgatorium
The Kurt Vonnegut of milblogs: Army of Dude
Conspiracy of disgruntled O-3s: Iraq Partii, Jason, and myself (of course)
Aggregating the good shit: Thunder Run and This Fucking War
The heavies: Argghhh!, Blackfive, and The Sandbox
Politics and the military: Vetvoice, Soldier's Perspective, Active Duty Patriot, and Vox Veterana
This shit's funny: The Sniper

Thank you to all these folks for blogging, so that I don't have to seek alternative forms of entertainment like drinking mouthwash to get hammered! Please let me know if I missed any.

Anti-Militarism Saves America!

MADD Founder Saves America: I've discussed before why the drinking age for military personnel should be lowered to 18, but the founder of Mothers Against Drunk Driving ain't buying it (h/t to Brian from work):

But Lightner was disgusted that our fighting men and women would have the audacity to imbibe. She ranted that 18-year-olds haven't "developed, and that's exactly why the draft age is 18, because these kids are malleable." She added: "They will follow the leader, they don't think for themselves, and they are the last ones I want to say, 'Here's a gun, and here's a beer.' They are not adult—that's why they're in the military. They are not adults."

I guess if you just hung around this milblog she could get the impression that all military people are naive youngsters. Joke's on her that I am well above the legal limit for drinking.

Seattle Hippies Save America: There are some activists in Seattle who think that the city pension fund should divest its holdings from the lurking evils of Caterpillar and Halliburton (I thought KBR, the largest contractor in Iraq, was no longer part of Halliburton, but I could be wrong):

We would like them to not invest in companies that are actively profiting from occupation and war," said Carla Curio, a spokeswoman for the campaign, Seattle Divest From War and Occupation. Curio acknowledged uncertainty over whether the group will ultimately be able to gather the approximately 18,000 minimum number of signatures. Still, she said, "We want to get in the public's consciousness that there could be conscientious investments."

Aw, geez. So much for Rosie the Riveter! I guess the city pension fund should invest in crappy-tasting organic foods that require more energy to harvest than those delicious chemically-treated snacks and hacky-sacks made in communist Cuba. That'll probably prop up these people living in co-ops for another summer of partying until they go back to begging their parents for cash. This would make sense if Iraq was a Darfur or Apartheid-era South Africa...but it's a war...fought by Americans...which I'm pretty certain Seattle is still part of...unless I missed a secession in my 10-month absence from the Puget Sound area.

Just so you don't think I'm picking on the ladies, Ms. MezzoSF is a fellow left-coaster who supports the troops, who kindly sent me this pic below. It sort of ties in nice with this post.

True on the left, not so much on the right

Iraq News (11 Apr)

The Good: Excellent NY Times article from Michael R. Gordon on joint operations in Sadr City and how it is improving the Iraqi Security Forces...along with the setbacks. It's a mixed bag on opinion of the ISF from US military in the field, but it can't be denied that the better they get, the smaller the US role will be. The Prez has announced that combat tours will be 12 months for Army units getting on the ground after August 1st. Deployments are still long, but 12 months is better than 15.

The Bad: A mass grave was found south of Baghdad in an area once known as the "Triangle of Death". Lately, it's been pretty calm due to the rise of the Sahwa and a larger military presence, but ugly remnants of Al-Qaeda and other terrorist thugs still remain.

The Ugly: Huge controversy over the Status of Forces Agreement between Iraq and the United States. Mostly because the plan is not to have it ratified by the US Senate. Insert negative comments about BushCheneyCo here. First, Mr. Sadr's people say they are going to get in touch with the religious authorities in Najaf about disbanding the Mahdi Army. Then, the word is out that Grand Ayatollah Sistani was never consulted. Not sure what's going on with this, but it will be interesting to see what develops today during Friday prayers.

Joint Ops in Sadr City

Heinous Times with the Petraeus/Crocker Assessment

I never understood why war critics get so upset with the Petraeus/Crocker assessments. I understand that there is much frustration with the war back on the homefront, but the way they characterize the two highly trusted public servants to prop up the rhetoric is silly. Granted, they didn't run that "General Betray Us" crap this time around, but it still seems like they're trying to plug the messenger. Shit, I know a lot of people are pissed off about the Iraq war, but why go after the public servants? It's like flipping the mailman the bird when the price of a stamp for postage to your rotten stoner kid at college goes up. He's not setting the postage rate, and Petraeus and Crocker aren't setting policy. Sure, the Bushies like to hide behind Petraeus, because his credibility is a bit better than theirs, but can't lefties see through this neo-con ruse? Democracy Arsenal ran a post called "Evan Bayh Slaps Crocker", Time has a piece called "Petraeus Meets his Match" when talking about Sen. Obama...uh, what? This isn't WWF, and it's certainly not Burma or Pakistan under Musharraf, since the military is subservient to the civilian leadership. Then the LA Times runs an article about excessive "martial bling" on Petraeus (thanks Blackfive), who are these people? Anyways, military and foreign policy in Iraq is set by the democratically elected leadership of this country, and we just follow orders with our sloppy uniforms and "excessive bling". So I bid you, dear reader, with a parting quote from the most excellent 1987 film classic "They Live" and it goes "You figure out your master plan, you let me know!"

Time Article on Screwing is Awkward and Embarrassing

While perusing for articles on Iraq, I noticed that the most read article on the Time website was one about married couples doing it. It's a Q&A with some author from Boulder (People's Republic of) who penned the book "The Sex-Starved Marriage". Frankly, I don't want to know about other people's sex lives. What is this, Europe? That's none of my goddamn business, especially if it's old geezers in the sack. Getting it on should be incredibly awkward, uncouth, and pornography should be utilized to mitigate sexual desires, albeit at a certain level of embarrassment endured by society. Indeed, our entire society is constructed on the premise of being sexually frustrated. Cities are built, economies are developed, books are written, culture is created, all due to the fact that men and women aren't getting any action. Even this modest blog has been a created completely with involuntary celibacy. So I say that no sex is certainly an altruistic notion that enables us as a civilization.

Gross

Iraq News (10 Apr)

The Good: An senior lieutenant to head of Al-Qaeda in Iraq, Al Masri, has been detained in Anbar. Christian Science Monitor has a deatiled story about our shaky alliance with former Sunni insurgents. At least Al-Qaeda in Iraq isn't faring so well.

The Bad: 3 Iraqi policemen have been killed due to a car bomb in Mosul. Errant mortars from militia thugs have killed three children in Sadr City, and US deaths are on the rise due to heavy fighting in that troubled district. Looks like the terrorist photographer that worked for the AP will fall under the Amnesty Law and the US military is still unsure how we are going to respond.

The Ugly: Interesting writeup on Sadr in the Mickey-D's newspaper that's worth checking out as it characterizes his popular support in Iraq despite the fact that the guy is an asshole. Dana Perino, White House press person, says that Al-Qaeda in Iraq constitutes the same threat level as Al-Qaeda in Pakistan/A-stan (hmm...I side more with our Ambassador on that issue). Time swoons over their messiah, Obama, because he zinged Crocker. Hey, Time, guess what? Crocker and Petraeus are public servants! This is the moral equivalent of playing a prank on the mailman...he's just doing his damn job! More on this later. A lot of this misdirected anger has to do with the Bush administration hiding behind Petraeus/Crocker, but the Dems don't have to buy it hook, line, and sinker.

Crazy Lou sez Less Money for the Military, More Money to kick out Illegals and flip out about Chinese imports

Help Make Gary the Most Hated Dude on the Internets

The 10 most hated people on the internet has been released by Radar (h/t LGF). The Marine that tossed the pooch was #4, Kos was #7 (the people who compiled this list must be Hillary fans), and notable Ivy-league douchebag John Fitzgerald Page was #2. But where the hell was Gary?

You might be wondering who this enigmatic Gary is. He's a former O-ganger from Pearl, shares my bitterness except his is to the nth degree, and once wouldn't come out to a bar on Friday night because he "gave up on life". Well, he got out of the Navy, which was probably a smart move. Of the 5 JOs who rotated to shore tour on my boat, 2 are at prototype at Charleston (if you don't what that is, trust me, it sucks), 1 is at GTMO, 1 is in Iraq (me), and 1 is heading to Iraq. So much for shore tour being the easy time. Anyhoo, enough whining, Gary resigned and I hadn't heard from him, but it seems like he's living pretty high on the hog as evidenced by this recent article in a Vegas newspaper.

As far as I can surmise, some gossip journalist was interviewing gentlemen involved in judging a boob contest at a strip joint in Vegas where any woman could sign up. Gary introduced himself as an arms-defense worker "We make shit what kills people. ... Death has been a successful business." Gary got angry about the evening's festivities "He then proclaimed the whole night a 'banal, insipid hell' peopled in a grandiose, least-common denominator.'" But he still found time to rock out "Gary pulled out two business cards and began to make them disappear, a magic trick. I told him I didn't believe his name was Newton. He confessed it was not and further admitted he was not from Ohio, but L.A. When he walked away, he pointed his fingers in the air, shook his hips and grooved toward the thump-thump DJ spinnings of Rage Against the Machine." Surely some of the female readers can be angry about such brash hooliganism. Help make Gary the most hated person ever, he'd find it hilarious.

Obama-maniacs Try to Portray SSG Bellavia as a Racist Goon

Disclaimer: I never wanted this election to be about race. Frankly, I could care less about the color of someone's skin, and I think Sen. Obama has clearly stated that he isn't into getting race involved with the Presidential debates either. But when some clown accuses a respected Iraq vet of making racist remarks, I'm not sitting on the sidelines like a mushroom. Fight fire with fire as Metallica once said.

SSG Bellavia has served our country with distinction and honor and is an all-around good dude who I talked with via email a couple of times. He's been doing the Vets For Freedom tour to get support for politicians in DC who want to see "victory" in Iraq (Ms. Robin has photos here). I've got some political disputes with VFF, but they are all military folk and I'm sure I'd drink a beer with any of them. I would certainly never engage in some kind of lameass attempt at character assassination to promote a political agenda. But now some Ivy-League jackass at the HuffPo is inciting that Bellavia's made a potentially "racially divisive" comment by likening Tiger Woods to Obama. What the shit! (note: the comments got turned off, but they were pretty tasteless as well) Do the people at HuffPo not understand that the military is one of the least racist institute in America that has been fully integrated for decades (Arrgghhh! has more). It's a pretty sad state of affairs for American politics when Obama fans have to characterize everyone who doesn't agree with his future Foreign Policy plans into some lowlife who just turned his Grand Wizard robe at the dry-cleaners.

Perhaps, the liberal elite should be more concerned with the own messages they are sending to the public. Recently, Obama was invited to some wingding in a ritzy area of San Francisco to schmooze with wealthy left-coast types. Their parade of expensive automobiles isn't convincing me that they are doing their part for the environment or conservation during these hard times, and it was pretty awkward when a US Senator had to enter the mansion for the fundraiser...via the servants' entrance. Zombie has all the photos.

Wealthy lefties make Obama look like some asshole

Iraq News (9 April)

The Good: Navy Seal, Petty Officer 2nd class Michael Monsoor, has been posthumously awarded the Medal of Honor for courage in Anbar Province in 2006. He's is the fourth recipient since 9/11. Sadr has cancelled the mass protests for today to coincide with the fifth anniversary of the fall of Baghdad, but has threatened to lift the ceasefire. Meanwhile, joint operations continue in Sadr city to target militia thugs, and the Kurdish Peshmerga might join in on the operations according to the KRG President Barzani.

The Bad: A prominent Sahwa sheikh has been assassinated (probably by Al-Qaeda terrorists) in Diyala, while 11 soldiers have been killed since Sunday (mostly in Baghdad). Petraeus said the Iraqi offensive in Basra wasn't adequately planned. I don't think you needed a crystal ball to glean that information. It looks like Grand Ayatollah Sistani is staying mum on the issue of disbanding the Mahdi Army as well.

The Ugly: Not surprisingly, the operations targeting gangs in Basra may have been about oil. In a country where 90% of its revenue comes from oil exports, would you expect any less? The Senate is frustrated that there is no easy exit from Iraq despite their attempts to discredit the well-respected public servants Petraeus and Crocker as a thinly veiled attack on Republican policy-making. Geez, don't shoot the messengers and they don't call it a "quagmire" for nothing. Protestors exercised their "freedom of speech" to perpetuate obnoxious shenanigans at the testimony. Congrats on your tired old hippie lovefests, now say hello to Mr. Taser.

How do these assbags keep getting into Congressional hearings?

Your Life as Political Capital

Perhaps I'm being morose, but I find being a pawn in a complex game of politics as slightly exhilarating, especially with such a unique front-row seat during the conflict of the decade. Much like knights clashed amongst each other during our feudal days, it seems the Iraq war has become a mere tool of noblemen playing dangerous parlor games with each other. Instead of a brutal conquest for land, the loss of life in Iraq is utilized as a bumper sticker or sound bite to boost poll numbers. I came to this realization by reading this Politico article:

Once Petraeus and Ambassador Ryan Crocker have returned to Iraq, Democrats may opt to revisit a measure sponsored by Sen. Jim Webb (D-Va.) that would require the type of 12-month-on, 12-month-off deployment schedule that was defeated during several Senate votes last year. Democrats may also push to have some of the $102.5 billion the Pentagon is expected to seek in the next supplemental shifted from the ongoing efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan to longer-term investments in equipment and military infrastructure.
Meanwhile, Republicans will be mining the testimony from Petraeus and other military leaders for their own rhetorical weaponry. For at least the past year, Republicans have tied the issue of readiness to the need for quick passage of supplemental spending bills. In addition to what military leaders call “rebalancing” the force, the Army needs a continuing flow of equipment, which gets interrupted when defense bills fall prey to the schedule of Congress.

Abu Muqawama touched on the political horseplay as well. Is this whole testimony from our two military and civilian leadership in Iraq solely a campaign stop for competing political factions? That's why I've always been so interested in politics. It's not simply a game where you blindly cheer on one side or another like football, it affects the very foundation and future of your existence. I came to Iraq because I wanted to "see what's going on". While my Green Zone logic will prevent me from knowing the ground truth of those outside the wire only know, I have had a pretty good chance to see how this war has affected American public opinion and DC politics. It's been quite the rollercoaster ride. If you want to know about Iraq from an apolitical point of view, I suggest reading the opening statements from Crocker and Petraeus (for laughs here's the one The Tank thought was going to be released). Other than that, every other pundit in the media and elsewhere will have their own interpretation based on a political agenda. Neo-conservatives will accentuate the progress, but neglect the shortfalls. Anti-war folks will only focus on the negatives and current challenges (this month, it's Shi'ite militias backed by Iran, next month maybe it will be invasion of the body snatchers). It's all so fascinating. Sit back and enjoy the ride. People out on the ground probably don't share this bizarre viewpoint that I do, as their life is in much more danger. I hope, for their sake, that they are shielded and unaware of the political strife back in America, and all the bullshit.

Are we all pawns?

Tuesdaze Bloggin' Roundup of Iraq (8 Apr)

Just in time for the testimony:

• Michael Totten on nation building
• Brandon Friedman on the Petraeus Testimony
• Abu Muqawama on the testimony and politics
• The Rude Pundit with tips on helping the widow of a slain soldier
• Jawa Report with video of a mortar cell getting blown away
• Arrrggh! with a dispatch from Ramadi
• Blackfive with a satirical opening statement for the testimony
• USO Girls offer up their support
• The Captain's Journal on politics and Iraq
• Iraq: The Purgatorium on the "Yang"
• This Fucking War on McCain's sons' service
• Newsweek Blog on the strained military
• The Angry American on his way home
• SGT Grumpy not happy with all this Shi'ite business (he's not alone)
• Mudville Gazette has a critique of the MSM coverage of the Iraq war
• Democracy Arsenal critical of the Blackwater contract renewal
• Danger Room with data on IEDs elsewhere
• The Tank with speculation on why the Stop-Loss movie bombed
• Iraq Pundit criticizes Sadr sympathizers
• Small Wars Journal on the latest NIE assessment
• Talisman Gate on Green Zoners flippin' out
• Soldier's Perspective lambastes defeatists
• Abu Aardvark blast the Kagans
• Matthew Yglesias not a fan of the Kagans either
• Iraqi Mojo on Shi'ite on Shi'ite violence
• Badgers Forward on his experiences in Karmah
• What the ... on the movie "Outside the Wire", sounds pretty good
• Dadmanly with his take on Iraq

Cheers!

Iraq News (8 April)

The Good: Operations continue in Sadr City to flush out militia thugs by Iraqi Security Forces and US Forces. There is potential for the Mahdi Army being disbanded, but it depends on what the senior Shi'ite religious authorities tell Sadr to do. There has been little coming from Grand Ayatollah Sistani in Najaf, which is most likely due to his poor health, unfortunately. He is arguably the most influential person in Iraq and was responsible for brokering the peace in 2004 between the Mahdi Army and coalition forces. It will be interesting to see what his spokesmen have to say.

The Bad: Four US soldiers were killed in action on Monday due to fierce fighting in Baghdad. The anti-occupation protests being called for by Sadr are planned for tomorrow as well.

The Ugly: The latest Salon piece to discredit the Petraeus/Crocker testimony to boost the rhetoric for the Dems proclaims that their anti-Iranian discussions are too harsh and "propaganda". Self-proclaimed expert of everything in the Middle East and liberal demagogue, Juan Cole, even says that there is no evidence that Iran directly provides weapons to the Mahdi Army! I guess the remnants of numerous blasts and explosions from Iranian mortars throughout the Green Zone I have heard/seen are all in my imagination. Oh well, he's a professor and smarter than me. However, I do think more rigorous with diplomacy is a good idea, and you can read about that here.

Grand Ayatollah Sistani: Key to Peace?

Much More Than You Ever Wanted to Know

Miss KJ over at Cabin Fever has "tagged" me in the blogosphere. Usually, I'm quite reluctant to discuss details about myself, because they are mediocre, embarrassing, and irrelevant. However, she is very nice, has a BF in Iraq, and I'm happy to oblige. So here it goes:

5 things I was doing ten years ago:

1) Planning exodus to Los Angeles

2) Wondering why everyone in high school sucked so bad

3) Thinking I was smarter than everyone else

4) Subsequently, realizing I was not smarter than anyone else

5) Learning to shut the fuck up and listen

5 things on my to-do list today:

1) Get yelled at by boss for not doing powerpoint in correct font and theme

2) Have people ask me if I have lost my mind, not gotten enough sleep, or a combination of both

3) Show lazy and questionable leadership by sending orders via emails to subordinates instead of turning around at desk and talking to them

4) Reading the book "Memories of Running" (it's pretty good!)

5) Updating countdown on when I get the fuck out of this place

5 snacks I enjoy:

1) Schlitz Malt Liquor

2) Menthol Cigarettes

3) Coffee without all the bullshit

4) 99 Bananas (it's liquor and extra high on the gay factor too! a sure way to meet chicks)

5) Knuckle Sandwiches

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:

1) Make political activist movie about why Al Gore is an inconvenient asshole

2) Give away money to charity, still live in lousy 1-bedroom apartment

3) Host my own Olympics in lieu of Beijing, except this one will have gambling and hookers without beating the shit out of peaceful Tibetan protestors

4) Pay off part of my deal with the devil

5) Build a totally badass deathray

5 bad habits:

1) Not smoking enough

2) Disgusting women on a routine basis

3) Having to wear a uniform with my name on it everyday like some gas station attendant

4) Not having enough private conservations with the voices in my head

5) Realizing on a daily basis the crushing burden of existence

5 places I've lived:

1) Hawaii (I didn't like it)

2) Washington State (Good times and shitty weather, just my style)

3) Los Angeles (in it's own world)

4) Charleston, SC (The south scares me, sorry)

5) Saratoga Springs, NY (more bars and horseys than you can shake a stick at)

5 jobs I've had:

1) Bag Boy at Grocery Store

2) Shop Rat at Automotive Factory

3) Lab Rat at UCLA Research Cell

4) Admin Junior Officer Weenie on Submarine

5) Staff Weenie in Iraq (I'm proud of my accomplishments, can you tell!)

Potrait of myself during Lambda Lambda Lambda days

Iraq News (7 April)

The Good: A monster-sized EFP cache has been found by the Iraqi Security Forces, and they also released 42 kidnapped students up in Mosul. US and Iraqi forces are stomping the militia in Sadr City. Sadr City is a district in Northeastern Baghdad once called "Saddam City" and subsequently renamed for Muqtada's father. It's heavily Shi'ite, and has been known to be a homebase for the Mahdi Army and some of the Iranian-backed militias. This operation is ultimately necessary to bring security to Baghdad. The Prime Minister and every other political bloc (except Sadr Trend) has endorsed a move to disarm all politically-affiliated militias prior to Provincial elections. This has been a long time in coming, and it will ultimately be beneficial (I hope).

The Bad: The Green Zone came under attack again yesterday with many casualties, unfortunately, along with FOB Rustamiya. I'm sure this will come up in the testimony for tomorrow. A huge market in Sadr City caught on fire yesterday. Iranian media says it was due to ongoing clashes, but I'm sure the militia's useful idiots in America will say it was due to US warmongers on a rampage or some such craziness (note: it was most likely due to errant mortar fire by militia thugs).

The Ugly: I guess all this Iraq business is simply for the purpose of a campaign stop. Glad to know that people are dying so that perspective Presidential candidates can get that soundbite in. Boo!

CNN does an embed with the non-enemy in Sadr City, the first of its kind in American Media

Deep-Seated Hatred of Yuppies

One bit of hatred I have fostered and have not been able to shake since adolescence is my scorn for yuppies. You know the type. The people founnd in urban and suburban dwellings with a foreign-made SUV sporting a camper attached to the roof, which is replete with bumper stickers about saving the environment and impeaching the president. Their endless quest to enhance their career, their wine and cheese parties, and their worship of their pets who get spa treatments all make me ill to my stomach. It's not so much an envy complex for what I don't possess, but rather a disgust for the entire culture. The fact that they attempt to "educate the public" for their paltry causes gives them moral justification to indulge themselves on an unsustainable lifestyle.

One thing I have found incredibly disturbing is their position on politics. I don't accuse them of apathy, but they tend to seek a political agenda which infringes on the life of everyone that doesn't subscribe to their creed. Yeah, they want public transportation, but for all the other people, jerks like you and me. They also seem to have some infatuation with bike lanes. What is this, the dark ages? Their desire to understand other cultures is not of a sense of respect or interest in history, but rather to exploit it for their own needs for the sake of authenticity. Because they don't want to admit that they are fake people, governed by their greed for endless consumption.
Their obsession with health and spending time at the gym is merely a distraction to avoid any discussion of their vapid souls while in a social setting. Because, it is only through struggle and hardship that we can gain experience and wisdom. The endless quest for hedonism and this "Garden of Eden" mentality that pervades our very shops and cafes in our city streets is untenable in a society of multiple individuals and it must be accepted that not everyone is going to be the same. This "Self-Confidence" and "Self-Esteem" that hack television hosts have been peddling for years fails to address the concept of humility. Only when you realize that you are not God's gift to humanity can you listen to others and gain knowledge from their insight. I've never thought that I had all the right answers, but I have been able to learn quite a bit from a variety of individuals from various backgrounds due to paying attention and not trying to come off like I am better than them. Perhaps, this is why I harbor so much hatred. It may be due to the fact that I deplore when people think they are somehow better than everyone else. Because this would imply that their is an "ideal" human being, when our modern world clearly indicates that ideals are subjected to a lot of discourse and debate.

Some may construe my hatred to me being part of the cult of victimization, where I see other people's actions as belittling and demeaning to my own. This is far from the truth, as the quickest way to enlightenment is through disavowing mere material luxuries. Only then can the truth be known. I have a lot to stay about willfully stupid people, but I'll save that for another day.

Iraqi Army Frees Kidnapped Students in Mosul

The Iraqi Security Forces have been taking a shellacking in the American media lately (see NY Times article on desertion). Just to quell Ivy-League naysayers, who take pleasure in highlighting shortcomings and failures of Iraqi institutions, the Iraqi Army has freed the 42 kidnapped students in Mosul. Not bad for a Sunday.

The Angst of Kurt Cobain Lives On

Daddy's little girl ain't a girl no more

I just remembered that Kurt Cobain killed himself (or his wife shot him if you're into conspiracy theory) 14 years ago. I still remember when that happened, and I was in 8th grade at the time. As a poorly-adjusted, rebellious middle-schooler, Niravana was pretty damn inspirational. I know it's cliche to say, but, unfortunately, music has been pretty shitty ever since. I guess I like some country and the punk resurgence in the late 90s, but that's about it. Mainstream music seems to have shifted from angst-ridden, iconoclastic rage to watered-down, corporate-ridden, bubblegum nonsense. Any musical suggestions past 1995, please leave a comment (note: no Jack Johnson, that guy blows).

Charlton Heston Passes Away, I Pay my Respects

R.I.P. 1924-2008

Charlton Heston passed away recently, after suffering from Alzheimer's for many years. Heston's list of cinematic achievements is pretty impressive. My personal favorites are Omega Man, Planet of the Apes, and, of course, Soylent Green. I didn't agree with a lot of Heston's culturally conservative values, but I certainly supported his unwavering support for the NRA. While I'm generally critical of celebrities in politics, Heston was the spokesman for the NRA when 2nd Amendment rights were under serious threat.

Back before the days of 9/11, there was mounting political pressure to heavily restrict gun ownership (despite the fact that it's pretty clear in the Bill of Rights). This culminated with the Million Mom March back in 2000, which was orchestrated by one of Hillary's friends and got mired in significant tax-evasion controversy. The efforts to portray gun owners as brain-dead hicks and to blame crime on, not the criminals, but the weapons they chose to use was gaining significant steam. Charlton Heston did a good job educating the public on, not just the use of firearms for hunting purposes, but how the curtailment of gun rights was frequently employed in history by tyrannical regimes (Stalin's Soviet Union, Nazi Germany, etc.) At the time, I was living in Los Angeles in a neighborhood that wasn't exactly the safest place in America. I was under 21, so by California's draconian laws I couldn't own a handgun, and getting a concealed weapons permit would have required some sort of pact with the devil. Meanwhile, criminals (who gun laws don't apply to) were on the streets wreaking havoc. Charlton Heston's beliefs represented a very good employment of common sense in a nation where some would want it's citizens to be unarmed sheep. So, thanks, Mr. Heston.

Soylent Green... It's People Damnit!

Bloggin' From the High Seas

LCDR Avery, XO of the USS Russell (DDG 59), and some members of his crew keep up a pretty rigorous blog over at The Destroyermen. The Navy has taken a backseat in the public eye in recent years, as most of our current conflicts involve operations on the ground. But being out to sea is no easy task, so if you want a glimpse of Navy life without having to endure the god-awful drills and shit breaking all the time, swing on by. The picture below is of the Engineering CPO performing a cleanliness inspection on the main engines. It reminded me of doing a closeout inspection on the sanitary tanks (that's the technical term for shit tank). Of course, I didn't come out with a smile on my face just vomit in my mouth. Good Times! While my sea-going days are over most likely, it's good to know that there is still sailors doing the hard time to deter "problematic" nations from making trouble (Iran, North Korea, etc.). Cheers!

The Joys of Tank-Diving

Iraq News (6 April)

The Good: Sahwa members have located an Al-Qaeda hideout near Samarra, where 1500 weapons were seized. There is wide political support in the Iraqi Government to disband all of the militias. The Badr Corps, militia of the Supreme Iraqi Islamic Council (SIIC), has already been largely incorporated into the Iraqi Security Forces. This is clearly a jab at the Mahdi Army, and it will be interesting to see what form this takes. Iraqi Parliament is working on reorganizing the state-run oil companies, which has the potential to curb corruption and smuggling.

The Bad: An Assyrian Orthodox Priest was shot to death in the Karrada district of Baghdad.

The Ugly: Senator Joe Biden (D-Delaware), says the surge has been a big dud. This coming from the guy who had the disastrous plan to divide Iraq into three various entities based on sect...I'm not taking a lot of stock in this guy.

HuffPo and the Politics of War

It's no secret that the Iraq war is heavily politicized and oft-debated. Arianna Huffington discusses how the Responsible Plan for Iraq will not just bring an end to hostilities, but is more importantly a "powerful tool" to slam the Republicans.

I've already discussed why that Plan was a P.O.S. But what really irks me is that something as significant as a war is being utilized by smarmy political elites for the sole purpose of poking the other side of the aisle in the eye. How do you make something like conflict into a talking point?

Inside the Reality of the Bad Voodoo Platoon

I first heard about the Bad Voodoo platoon from JP over at Milblogging. PBS Frontline ran a 1-hour special that was sort of like the ultimate embed. Iraq reporting often gets mired into political diatribe as the war itself has become the most decisive issue amongst the American public in recent memory. This documentary strictly focuses on the perspective of the soldiers and leaves all the punditry on the cutting room floor. The platoon does convoy security missions from Kuwait into Iraq, which is quite the brave endeavor (especially up north). The documentary focuses a lot on the head NCO, SFC Toby Nunn, and it's good to know that there are leaders like him to take care of business. The documentary runs the emotional gamut and discusses their anxieties, boredom, and comradery. Well worth checking out and it's a much more authentic portrayal of the military in a time of war than that Stop-Loss movie, which I'm sure is too Hollywood. People often say they don't know what life is like in Iraq for the soldiers...well now's your chance. I've linked to JP and Nunn's milblogs, and I found another one entitled Hard Soldier. Some screen captures are below.

Convoy Rollin'

Secondary IED found

SFC Nunn chats it up with the Iraqi Security Forces

Problems with the Old Lady on Deployment is nothing new

Freaky Nazi Sex Orgy

Somethings just speak for themselves and do not require commentary (H/T to an anonymous reader).

McHenry's "Two-Bit Security Guard" Remark

There has recently been some justifiable outrage in the blogosphere over Rep. McHenry (R-NC) calling one of the sentries inside the Green Zone a "two-bit security guard" during a CODEL visit. ThinkProgress, Agitprop, and Hot Air all initially postulated that he was referring to a US soldier, but later corrected themselves. In the spirit of the blogosphere being a self-regulating entity, the "two-bit" security guard in question was not a US soldier, but rather a Peruvian sentry hired by the private security contractor, Triple Canopy. McHenry's frustration in the fact that he couldn't get to the gym does not consider that security in the Green Zone is no fuckin' joke. US Embassies have been targeted by terrorists in the past, and Iraq clearly has an elevated terrorist threat. Therefore, one can surmise that security is going to be taken a little more seriously than a NASCAR event in McHenry's home state. I for one am grateful for the Peruvian contractors as they only make about $1,000/month and I have seen nothing but a high standard of professionalism. The LA Times had a story about them a few months back if you're interested. So regardless of the fact that it wasn't a US soldier McHenry was talking about, he's still a jackass for saying this.

Triple Canopy: Keeping me off Al-Jazeera for close to 10 months!

Iraq News (5 April)

The Good: The AP has the scoop that the Prez will announce a decrease in combat tours from 15 months to 12 months for the Army. While the deployment cycle is still pretty grueling, at least this is a move in the right direction. US troops move on Sadr City to pounce on militia thugs, but the Prime Minister has announced a freeze on targeting these groups. It is hard to determine where this is going...

The Bad: A suicide bomber has struck a funeral in Diyala province. Anti-American protests by followers of Sadr took place after Friday prayers yesterday (Iranian media was quick to jump on that one). I'm starting to get the feeling that the Iranian state-controlled media doesn't like the US much, but it's still just a hunch.

The Ugly: Blackwater contract to be renewed?!? Oh my. There was a lot of controversy following the Nisoor Square incident on Sep. 16th, and apparently it is still being investigated after all these months. Also, the Brits fear that General Petraeus will stir up the pot with Iran during the upcoming Congressional testimony. I guess the facts of nefarious Iranian influence are simply inconvenient to some.

Combat tours to be shortened from "too goddamn long" to just "really long"

Multi-Billionaire Imbecile, Ted Turner, Says the Military Sucks

The Thurston Howell of nutty liberals and founder of CNN, Ted Turner, recently made some ridiculous claims about mankind degenerating into cannibalism because of global warming (despite this winter being the coldest in years, brrr). From the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:

"Most of the people will have died and the rest of us will be cannibals," said Turner, 69. "Civilization will have broken down. The few people left will be living in a failed state — like Somalia or Sudan — and living conditions will be intolerable." One way to combat global warming, Turner said, is to stabilize the population. "We're too many people; that's why we have global warming," he said. "Too many people are using too much stuff." Turner suggested that "on a voluntary basis, everybody in the world's got to pledge to themselves that one or two children is it."

Whether or not Ted suggests a Stalin-like purge of the unwashed masses remains in the realm of speculation, but I find this typical of obscenely wealthy people who don't practice what they preach. Ted's wiki says he is the biggest land-owner in the US and an avid yachtsman, which proves he's not jumping on the conservation bandwagon anytime soon.

Speaking of land ownership, the US military is sworn to protect the property of American citizens, even if they are loudmouth jackasses. You'd think he'd be grateful that someone protects his vast, sprawling estate. But Ted says we're doing a crappy job, despite the tax dollars invested (which I'm sure he avoids paying due to loopholes and offshore bank accounts):

He said that despite the United States' huge military budget, "we can't win in Iraq." "We're being beaten by insurgents who don't even have any tanks, they don't have a headquarters, they don't have a Pentagon, we don't even know if they have any generals," Turner told Rose. Turner called the Iraqi insurgents "patriots" who "don't like us because we invaded their country and occupied it. Nobody likes to be invaded."

Even a cursory analysis of the Iraq war would reveal that the US has never lost a major military engagement. Rather, Iraq's problems stem from a history of underlying sectarian hatred that has been accentuated by foreign terrorists, a crippled infrastructure under Saddam, and a lousy plan for reconstruction by the neo-conservative architects. Ted must have spent too much time getting his political opinions from his ex-wife, Hanoi Jane.

I write this not because there hasn't been "We Don't Support the Troops" opinions in the past, but I've never seen this meme from someone with this much money and influence. The best way to counteract this disinformation is through a combination of refuting the argument with logic, humiliation of the perpetrator, and publicly ostracizing them to a pariah status. I will not sit idly by as political elements in America take their frustrations out on the US Armed Forces, since direct democracy does not have the impact they desire (much like what happened to our Vietnam Vet predecessors). Stay vigilant and don't put up with this crap from any ugly side of American politics.

Surviving the Inevitable Zombie Holocaust

I always wondered what kind of society we would degenerate into following the upcoming zombie takeover. The destruction of resources and infrastructure that comes with a nuclear apocalypse would be accompanied by a Road Warrior style clash for power. But, in a Zombie apocalypse, individuals could probably just hole up inside a mall like in Dawn of the Dead, which would be a major improvement over my current lifestyle (hey, at least I could drink). So to survive the initial onslaught, the Danger Room blog over at Wired has some pretty good tips. You better take notes.

Zombies Love Them Some Brains

Pregnant Males and Other Genetic Oddities

Some pregnant dude (who used to be a chick, I guess) showed up on Oprah and said "It’s not a male or female desire to have a child. It’s a human desire." It goes without say that this is not some traditional female aspiration, like interpretive dance, that men are courageously defying gender roles to join...it's pregnancy. Where the fuck is the baby going to come out! I hope all those stories about the stork were true, otherwise it's going to be an absolutely horrific mess. Oh well. If Oprah is sanctioning pregnant dudes, I think society would be okay with me sticking a bunch of needles in my face ala Pinhead in Hellraiser.

Iraq News (4 April)

The Good: Iraq is making some progress on the Oil Law, which will allow more private investment to flow into Iraq and therefore more money for reconstruction. In McClatchy of all places, they write a lengthy report on US forces making progress in Khan Bani Sa'ad in Diyala province. Imagine that. If McClatchy would've started reading milbloggers from Diyala, they would've known that this is not new news. The Prime Minister has vowed a crackdown on militia thugs in Sadr City (it's about freakin' time).

The Bad: Sadr has called for massive protests against those devilish Americans for April 9th in the holy city of Najaf. Ironically, this is scheduled for the 5th anniversary of the fall of Baghdad and the fall of Saddam's regime...the same regime that assassinated his father. Uh, okay. One Airman was KIA in Baghdad yesterday. Newly released data from the Iraqi government states that over 1,000 Iraqi Police and Iraqi Army abandoned their posts or joined with the militia during last week's offensive. Not the kind of professional security we were all hoping for.

The Ugly: The Dems are already crying foul on the upcoming Petraeus/Crocker testimony before it has even started. They want the latest NIE report unclassified, and Pelosi is already saying that she wants the report sans sugarcoating. If she had paid attention to the last testimony instead of turning the whole thing into pundit grandstanding like politicians tend to do, she would've realized that it was pretty accurate.

Nancy Pelosi: Guranteed to make a big stink next week

The Nutty World of Zawahiri

Al-Qaeda's #2 recently addressed questions from wanna-be jihadists via the internet (h/t This Ain't Hell). To emphasize the fact that the dude is a whack job, he denied the fact that Al-Qaeda kills civilians. The laundry list of Al-Qaeda perpetuated suicide bombings against Iraqi civilians is long, tragic, and horrifying (and that's just one country where Qaeda has wreaked havoc). I guess in his own pathetic world the 8th century caliphate is the model for civilization, TV is a US-Zionist conspiracy to control the world, and hiding in a cave in the tribal region of Pakistan constitutes a strategic victory.

What an Asshole

Pretty Much the Standard for the Navy

People who have zero experience either being in the military or knowing people in the military seem to have these pre-conceived notions that folks who choose to serve our country are all soul-less, politically correct robots that don't know how to have a good time. That's why it doesn't surprise me that WSJ ran a ridiculous piece on McCain canoodling with a ladyfriend during a port visit in Brazil in his Navy days like it was some big freakin' scandal (it registered pretty damn low on my shock factor). Wonkette turned up the snark to take jabs at the Republican, but all of these potshots fail to neglect the fact that this is pretty much the MO for sailors. Granted, McCain was an officer, so he should be held to more scrutiny. But, anyone who thinks that playing Xbox and calling home is a "super-fun time" for a sailor in a liberty port, who has to go back out to sea for 2 months afterwards, needs to have their head examined. Our enlisted single guys need to have some good times while in-port, since working out at sea is a grueling, boring, and extremely laborious endeavor. To deny them the chance to uh...meet and greet the ladies in exotic port locations is extremely detrimental to morale. The Army has already succumbed to this gross intrusion of politically correct nitwitology, setting R&R policies by shipping troops from the frontlines to Qatar for a 4-day pass, where alcohol consumption is limited to a lousy 3 beers a day, and they've got you locked up on base like the prison camp from Running Man. I apologize to female sailors for not understanding what their idea of a good time in port is, but I imagine it's not sitting around some Stalin-era barracks room on base somewhere. The double standard in American society is that legions of meathead college students (the future leaders of America) are allowed to descend upon places like Cancun and make complete asses out of themselves, but the minute someone from the military decides to drink a shot of the dreaded Habu-Sake in Okinawa, it's some kind of international incident. I'm not a big McCain fan because of his bizarre opinions on foreign policy, but I certainly give the guy respect for meeting this Brazilian babe. Man, he didn't even have to pay for it, good for him!

Thailand, a sailor's idea of a good time (watch out for the lady-boys)

Iraq News (3 April)

The Good: Now that some of the dust has settled from the hell that broke loose last week, coalition and Iraqi security forces are conducting humanitarian ops throughout areas where the violence erupted. A good plan to ensure violence doesn't re-emerge in our faces again. Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Adm. Mullen, says US troop reductions (to ~140,000) are still on track.

The Bad: Suicide bomber kills 7 last night near Mosul. Mosul is considered to be the last urban bastion of Al-Qaeda, but the huge mix of various tribes and sects in Iraq's third largest city will make defeating the enemy take some time. Some of the Iraqi Security Forces were "not up to the task" of following orders in light of the recent Basra offensive and showed their militia allegiance. This has been a significant problem for the Iraqi security forces for as far back as I can remember.

The Ugly: You can read the WSJ Op-Ed entitled "The Second Iran-Iraq War" from Kim Kagan if you want a healthy dose of disinformation with your morning coffee. She gets the fact that Iran is sending weapons and training into Iraq right, but kind of glosses over the Iraqi government's ties with Iran. And for god sakes Ms. Kagan no one wants another Iran-Iraq war much like no one wants to see trench warfare and mustard gas on the Western Front come back into style. For some insight into the US involvement with the Basra operations, NY Times has a pretty thorough analysis on what GEN Petraeus and AMB Crocker had to say about this whole thing.

Prime Minister Maliki schmoozin' with Basra sheikhs several days too late

Stop-Loss Bombs

Despite tackling a current event and starring mega-hunk Ryan Phillippe, the movie Stop-Loss has officially tanked worse than a Martin Lawrence comedy. It has grossed a crappy 4.5M it's opening weekend despite a massive advertising blitz. I'm a little, uh...hunkered down right now, so I was unable to see it, but GI Kate, Alex, and Jon Soltz, all of whom are vets, weighed in on the movie. This flick may bring up a significant problem with the military, but it looks like America might not be interested. I could take the cynical-jackass route and proclaim that Americans are a bunch of dickfaces, but I think the problem may lie with the lack of authenticity. Hollywood likes to portray the military as goofball hicks, and it seems phony when they try to make a meaningful movie about Iraq, since their take on foreign policy is so misinformed. My personal hero, Greg Gutfeld, sums it up best:

Look - we don't need war movies to remind us that war is bad - we know that. Plus, mainstream media is already doing a bang up job ramming home that idea - even to the point of ignoring good or encouraging news about the conflict.

But I guess what bothers me most about the flick is being lectured by people who are fundamentally more flawed than the rest of us. Really, is the act of stop-loss worse, on a personal level, than cheating on your wife and mother of your two kids - with your saucy little costar? I'd ask Ryan Philippe that, but I'm already over him. He's no Orlando Bloom.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

I'm with Greg, in that I don't want to shell out 10 bones to hear about Iraq from some flaming douche sipping a martini at the Sky Bar. I think the best Iraq movies will be made by Iraq vets, much like the great Vietnam movies (Platoon, Born on the Fourth of July) were made by an Nam vet (Oliver Stone). Hollywood is just way too out of touch with the military to get it right. In the meantime, check out this post on IRR callups from Iraq Partii to grasp the problems with filling spots in a war zone, or check out the new PBS special, Bad Voodoo's War which sounds like it will be pretty good. The Iraq war movie that wins an Oscar may be a long way off.

Pretty people couldn't even save this colossal dud

Tuesdaze Bloggin' Roundup of Iraq (2 April)

Yeah, yeah, I know it's Wenesday, but I had to switch shifts. My apologies. Here's some interesting stuff on Iraq, give it a read:

• Brandon Friedman talks about the possible implementation of the draft
• Iraqi Bloggers Central on Fixing Muqty
• Michael Yon has the scoop on terrorist whorehouses near Tal Afar
• Jawa Report on mass Al-Qaeda graves
• CDR Salamander criticizes the sleep with your wife policy being implemented in Iraq
• Doc in the Box chills out during an afternoon in Iraq
• Michael Totten's latest from Karmah
• Talisman Gate has his own perspective on the whole situation in Basra
• Matthew Ygleisas, funny guy Harvard type, has an April Fool's post
• Vox Veterana on our uninformed, lousy generation
• Democracy Arsenal lambastes the military intelligence apparatus for being clueless on Basra
• Small Wars Journal contemplates a different strategy for Iraq
• Abu Aardvark talks about Basra and power struggle
• Long War Journal on the Sadr ceasefire
• GI Kate on that Stop Loss movie
• Iraq the Model on defeating the Mahdi Army
• Inside Iraq on the suckness of curfews in Baghdad
• Little Green Footballs says Stop Loss bombed worse than a Mariah Carey flick
• Operation Yellow Elephant on the lack of the elite class signing up for the military
• Zen Traveler on chaos in Baghdad
• War Junkie with stories from the streets of Baghdad
• Abu Muqawama on the dangers of ignoring militia-influence in Iraq
• Disaffected and it Feels So Good on the Surge
• Crooks and Liars humiliates Bush
• False Motivation on dealing with corruption
• Libertarian Leanings on winning against the Shi'ite militia
• War is Boring on SEALs in Iraq
• Iraq: The Purgatorium reflects
• One Marines View on blunders
• Angry American on operations in Baghdad

Some VetVoice posts of mine:

• Shi'ite Happens
• War Deserters Should Stay in Canada (because they are a disgrace to America)
• Women in Combat? (I say yes!)

Cheers! Keep your head down.

Iraq News (2 April)

The Good: The Iraqi-led operation in Basra continues with the Mahdi Army stepping aside. Sounds like the Iraqi Security Forces wants control of the port facilities, which is the lifeline of the economy and supposedly run by the Fadhila party. Of course, the Prime Minister called the whole operation a rousing success, but most others remain skeptical. Shell is still interested in investing in Iraqi oil infrastructure.

The Bad: Predictably, Iraqi deaths climbed for the month of March due to the recent violence, as did US casualties. While, the death toll is still heinous and tragic, it's nothing like it was one year ago, where dozens of bodies were found daily in Baghdad as a result of sectarian strife. The British have put the kaibash on their troop withdrawal plans due to the recent escalation of violence in Basra. What's the British word for quagmire? Bullocks, I guess.

The Ugly: Dr. Sheikhli tells his tale of being kidnapped by the Mahdi Army and what he did to survive. And April Fool's for Iraqis? I thought posting about Sadr being schwacked in an air strike would've been a funny gag, but probably a bit much during this turbulent political period.

Welcome to Iraq, the tour bus departs at 9am!

Rich Wife Wanted for Subsequent Divorce

In the aftermath of the battle of sexes that has raged through our culture for the past several decades, it is apparent that American men have taken a serious ass-kicking. No, I'm not some fundamentalist creep talking poorly about women's rights and equality (I agree with all that), but rather the standards we hold for the opposite sex. American women seem to want a man who is up to speed on postmodern literature, works out at the gym 13 hours a week, owns a successful business (something eco-friendly), drives a nice car, takes time on the weekends to do totally extreme sports while simultaneously working with "the children", and has a handsome mug. These absurdly high expectations just cannot be met by those of us with a type-B personality, and our standard for women includes "Uh, is that really a chick?" and "She's not dead, right?". I've heard rumors that women want a man with high standards, but these tactics will most likely get you completely humiliated at any place where men and women mingle.

To counter this glaring inequality in our modern web of relationships, I propose that some rich lady marry me, divorce me, and pay me alimony (think of the good it will do for society!). WSJ had an article about more and more men countering the cultural taboo of seeking alimony payments (h/t to perennial crank Debbie Schlussel). As a selling point, my attributes include: a most excellent DVD collection with not just one, but two copies of the horror classic "Silent Night, Deadly Night", no loss of shame when you hide me in the closet somewhere when your high class girlfriends come to visit, frequently zoning out during talks in a way that looks like I'm paying attention, and various other amenities. The divorce would be emotionally simplistic, as you give me the boot since you get tired of me sitting around the house drinking beer and hanging out on the internet all day. Think of the boost to your ego when you proclaim to everyone that you got rid of that loser (which would be me fleeing the state), and how it will make you feel that much younger. All for the low, low price of $1,000/month for the rest of my mediocre existence.

Think about it!

Quds Force Behind the Ceasefire

The Iranian Quds Force (labeled a terrorist organization by the US) was behind the Muqtada al-Sadr ceasefire which halted much of the violence in Basra, Baghdad, and much of southern Iraq. The Iranian foreign minister also called for an end to the bloodshed on March 29th when things were chaotic. The Tank has a writeup questioning what the ruling Iraqis ceded to Iran in doing this, and I'm certainly rattling my brain trying to figure it out as well. Iranian influence is responsible for the Hezbollah-style training of proxy militias in Iraq and it is also behind the most lethal roadside bombs, EFPs. However, Iran probably doesn't want to see inra-Shi'ite violence in Basrah, since it will cut off a large portion of their revenue stream. In fact, Iran benefits from good relations with Iraq, since the Iraqi cities of Karbala and Najaf are very holy to Shi'ite Muslims. The foreign policy wonks back stateside need to figure out a way to get Iran to stop it's malign influence, but still allow it to do productive things for Iraq. That's going to take some pretty crafty diplomacy, and I might as well be hoping for a miracle at this point. We shall see, does anyone want a war with Iran? I hope not at this point. War would be a failure of diplomacy, and I'm hoping someone can pull out all the stops. Maybe I'd have better chances of hoping for a UFO to beam me up and take me away from this colossal mess.

There's no Iranian influence in Iraq? Yeah, keep drinking the kool-aid, buddy

Iraq News (1 April)

The Good: Things have pretty much calmed down where fighting was the worst in Baghdad and Basra due to the Mahdi Army uprising. That's of course after a thorough shellacking taken by the militia thugs (the body count of enemy KIA from the Ministry of Interior is well into the triple digits). Sadr and Friends made a smart move to stash their weapons and conduct politics instead of violence. I just don't know how long that is going to last.

The Bad: LA Times takes a stab at dissecting some of the messy politics behind this whole fiasco. I thought the Quds Force commander in Iran orchestrating the Sadr ceasefire was a pretty interesting twist. I'm waiting for the dude in the clownsuit to show up and grant 24/7 electricity to Iraqi citizens with one toot of his clown horn. This region never ceases to amaze me.

The Ugly: Kudos to the Gulf News for stating the obvious, Iraqis don't like the Green Zone! They probably don't like that monstrosity of a new US embassy either, but who am I to judge.

Militia strongholds, not looking so good (here comes the US taxpayer-funded relief effort)

And a Big Fuck You to American Media

The American media's use of freedom of speech has long been an ideal protected under our constitution, which we in the military are sworn to defend. But what about when the media actively engages in undermining the security of US forces abroad? I think that entitles me to flip the bird to the media outlets in question. And I'm not talking about jackass Mahdi Army lovers over at Kos (this draft-dodging asshole accused my buddy Brandon Friedman of being a neo-con, the last guy on earth I would label such), but rather large-time rags like CNN. They published the story about security precautions being taken in the Green Zone following numerous rocket attacks. There's the news, and then there's sensationalism and relishing of violence. Do they not understand that the reason the enemy does this is because it gets such huge press? Are they so blinded by their hatred of BushCheneyHalliburtonCo that they don't even understand they are getting their fellow countrymen killed? I'm not saying that everything should read like military propaganda, but please don't enable the enemy if you are an American media outlet. I have also been flabbergasted by the lack of coverage on the militia thugs getting squashed for launching rockets (smart move on their part to go with the ceasefire). There's some MNF-I press releases here, here, and here. Also, for a really good story, check out Angry American who was out on the streets of Baghdad (praise to those that have more courage than I). When I get back to the states, I want to buy this man a beer...I also would like to leave a burning bag of dogshit at the front door of CNN's corporate headquarters in Atlanta.

Right here, CNN...Right Here

Give Me Money!

You may think I'm some douchey sell-out to the Pentagon propaganda machine, but I need money to spruce up my truck (it needs some kickass neon mudflaps...and some racing stripes). There's an interesting article in Wired where military college types consider secretly hiring bloggers to conduct information ops.

"Hiring a block of bloggers to verbally attack a specific person or promote a specific message may be worth considering," write the report's co-authors, James Kinniburgh and Dororthy Denning.

Shit, I'll say whatever! Actually no, this is probably the dumbest idea I have heard in awhile. Don't they understand that this will threaten the credibility of the entire blogosphere and ultimately make the military look bad?

The Grasshopper Lies Heavy

"The Grasshopper Lies Heavy" is the name of a novel within a novel from Philip K Dick's legendary Man in the High Castle. It's a very bizarre and disorienting story about a world where the Allies lost in World War II and the Nazis and Japanese occupy America and treat us like second-class citizens (many others are slaughtered mercilessly). But there is one brave man who writes a book from the Rocky Mountains, "The Grasshopper Lies Heavy", about how the Allies won and the world is so much different.

My mind gets spun up at times, and I wonder if there is an alternate world somewhere of things that were done differently after 9/11. The President makes an appeal for all young men and women to join the Armed Forces or diplomatic-type professions, and Afghanistan is shortly invaded by a coalition of nations and the Taliban/Al-Qaeda thugs are roundly defeated. Consumption of oil declines as the president urges Americans and European nations to starve Saudi Arabia of their monetary base, since they were ultimately responsible for this sick brand of Wahhabism that has plagued our society. Through strong diplomatic undertakings, corrupt regimes in the Middle East fall one-by-one as our moderate allies such as Turkey, Lebanon, Jordan, and Egypt become emboldened. Al-Qaeda is roundly rejected by nations such as Pakistan, Iraq, and Syria as they see what ill terrorism can bring after the 9/11 attacks. Saudi Arabia is coerced into installing some semblance of a modern democracy. Oh wait...it's April Fool's Day. Sorry folks!

Dear Abby: Why is my BF a Pederast?

My mother frequently tried to improve my manners by posting Dear Abby clippings on the fridge while I was growing up. Whether or not this was beneficial is unclear, but I certainly feel the same way as Ms. Abby in her latest response.

A reader writes questioning the moral ramifications of her boyfriend, who coincidentally is a single dad that likes to sleep in the same bed as his 13-year old daughter.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating "Jim," a single father of an 18-year-old son and a 13-year-old daughter, "Jenna." The girl is very close to her parents to the point that she sleeps with them. On nights she's with Jim, she shares a bed with him. Jim and his ex have been divorced since Jenna was 2. She shared their bed while they were married. I no longer bring up the subject. I guess you could say Jim and I have agreed to disagree. However, I don't think a 13-year-old girl should be sharing a bed with her father. To put it bluntly, it gives me the creeps.

To which Abby responds:

Jenna is no longer a child, and frankly, to continue this practice is inappropriate and potentially stimulating for both of them.

If I was Ms. Abby, I would have also advised the reader to look for the tell tale signs of a kid-toucher such as an '88 Aerostar Van with no windows, a NAMBLA gazette, and scars around the gentleman's kidneys where he got shanked while doing a 3-5 stint at the state prison.

Am I the only guy who thinks Dear Abby is hot?